'Enjoyed your post. I have written for many years and I identify with your statement to "write as if you were dead". I never heard it put that way. Growing up in a small town shaped me in so many ways for which I will be eternally grateful. Then, there were the "rules" of politeness and self preservation that formed a constrictive cast around me that made truth very hard to tell. A friend of mine just spoke with me concerning a situation that involves the polite concern and being able to say "no" without self condemnation or regret.
My friend is taking care of an invalid husband and had recently had a conversation with her friend of many years who was "stuck" in a nursing home, as she put it. This friend is immobile, practically blind and a cancer patient. My friend was approached with the proposition of the old friend coming to live at her house since the nursing home was so undesirable. Of course, my friend, had to say "no" as she just couldn't possibly take on that responsibility. That, to me, made total sense but my friend is burdened over having to refuse. All these years my friend has been known as the "unselfish giver". There has to come a time for all of us that the truth is good enough and shouldn't be a sense of guilt that we must carry.
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