Ok so you workout and you see the hotties at the gym and you probably think that you should be able to get one of them because you are into the same thing right? It seems logical but these bootylicous fitness girls are ultimately going to be some of the hardest girls to get.
Let's think about it. There are way more guys working out and lifting weights like this than there are girls. Those girls working out like this have a wolf pack after them constantly.
Not just at the gym but also on Instagram. Dudes are just begging them to let them lick the sweat off the leg press machine after they are finished. These low level savages pretty much lose their minds.
These girls start thinking they are hotter and hotter until their ego tells them they are almost too good for anyone they see. The same thing happens to some guys as well. Not that they have people coming up to them all the time but to where even on a closer look even the girls who other guys are drooling over don't look that amazing up close. They can never "settle" for someone. The girls keep thinking they are going to get this tingly feeling when they meet the right guy like they got when they were 15 years old. Disney sold them hard on the fairy tale and as the years go on they get desensitized to feeling any excitement when a guy tries to talk to them.
Mere peasants to a girl who has 2,313 followers on Instagram. (Follow 4 Follow) lol
The problem again isn't just the girls thinking they are too good for everyone it is that guys and girls can't put up with anyone for any length of time at this point. Hardly anyone can accept anyone's flaws including myself sometimes.
Honestly I don't even know what to think about it sometimes. I mean just being 100% honest with you right now a lot of times when I see people together in real long term relationships they either look like they don't belong together or they seem really unhappy. There are a few rare exceptions to this observation but the divorce rates are a big indicator to this. In places like California it is 60% divorce rate.
What about all the people who want to get a divorce but are too scared to because of the kids they have or because of the financial bond they have created?
Let's just pretend that 25% of marriages are going well which would probably be a pretty high number. Man..... that is looking scary to a lot of people.
How Are You Going To Get A Swolemate?
Back on track guys..... let's sort through this. Here is where we are going to all get flipped on our heads. Just because you are jacked ripped and tanned doesn't mean you are going to get with these seemingly equivalent girls. You don't know what is going through their heads at all. I dated this fitness girl for a little bit in college when I was 21. She had been in a couple of women's physique competitions and then to my surprise she was in my bed one night and I smelled smoke in her hair. I was like do you smoke? It turned out she smoked cigarettes. I mean WTF? Yeah that didn't make sense. Yeah she had a muscle ass but there were a lot of red flags even beyond the smoking cigarettes.
Also another thing you have to worry about with the fitness girls is a lot of them might be on a low level testosterone called Anavar. The girl in the first picture has a physique which is naturally obtainable but when girls pass a certain threshold there are a lot of signs that I can spot.
If there is an over development of the deltoids on a man or a woman then it becomes very suspect. They are likely on performance enhancers.
Does it matter? Well it might. Maybe they are extra horny with the extra testosterone or maybe they don't really like guys because they are becoming more of a man. I really can't say for sure. I have never had a conversation with a chick who is admitting being on roids. I have a friend though that he admitted his wife took some Anavar and she even got crazier than she normally was. She was more easily aggravated which made sense to me. She got pissed at him and shoved him into the wall. He didn't help the situation by punching 3 holes in the dry wall. Out of control for sure.
The point is you don't know what that is going to do to the girls moods or her thought processes. Maybe you try to get her number and she just choke slams you! lol
Also you can be surprised by the type of guys the girl might end up with. You might envision them with someone who is athletic and lifts weights but a lot of people have body image issues and by her being around a guy who is really fit and lean she could start feeling like she is fat. I know it sounds crazy but it is a real thing. One minute these girls might think they are the hottest chick in the city and then later they eat a piece of pizza and they are messed up in the head because they think they are going to get cottage cheese thighs.
Guys feel like they always see hot girls with a scrub and girls always think they see attractive guys with unattractive girls.
The reason is because for on if you are a straight guy your not going to give your competition the benefit of the doubt and you are just going to size the guy up and figure he is a low level scrub unless you talk to him and you determine him to be cool. You are only going to concede that a guy has a lot going for him if he is in the upper 1% of society in the looks department. Same thing for women. They are going to hate on the competition but if some chick is a celebrity and has the looks then they will give the girl a pass.
Moral of the story...... If you are a fit athletic male then a lot of girls are intimidated by you. If you are a fit athletic female a lot of guys are intimidated by you.
So I Broke My Rule
I usually don't get girls numbers at the gym for a lot of reasons. For one they always have headphones in plus I don't like to bother people during their workout. This ends up being a precarious situation because really when it boils down to it there are only a few locations where the hottest girls in Tucson are. At the different LA Fitness locations in town and the U of Arizona campus would be good starting places. I'm sure you won't be disappoint in what you are seeing.
A new chick showed up at my LA Fitness and I was the only one shooting baskets. She came in and started shooting baskets at the other end. I only had to see her dribble a little bit and shoot the ball twice and I knew she played college somewhere. I have a pretty good eye for talent. I went over and talked to her and asked if she played in college. She said she did and we had a conversation about sports but I could tell she liked me because she was smiling and sort of blushing talking to me. I didn't push for the number that day which was risky. I had never seen that chick before but then luckily I saw her the next week and went over and talked to her and got her number.
Everything is going as planned so far but in the same token I can't get too mentally hung up on the situation or I will accidentally risk looking too desperate at some point.
I know what you guys are thinking. You are wondering if she is hot or not. If she wasn't hot I wouldn't have broke my rules. On top of that she is athletic which brings her up a notch. Let's just say this. Every time I have seen her at the gym she has super hot yoga pants on and a sports bra showing her stomach and her belly button piercing off. She is dressed to impress and everyone is looking.
How do I not lose my mind and beg to lick her sweat off the leg press machine after she is done with it?
I'm going to be honest to the three of you that are still reading this blog. Oddly enough I'm talking to a bunch of different girls right now. Clearly the bootylicious girl from the gym is the hottest one but until that situation solidifies itself I'm not going to stop talking to these other girls. I'm assuming bootylicious girl is probably 25, another chick is 32, another one is 36, then there is a 26 year old, oh yeah and there is a 19 year old. It might sound bad or insane but in reality I haven't had any conversation to any of these girls that we are in some committed relationship or something. One of them is bouncing back and forth between here and New Mexico but is moving back in two weeks but the point is there is no sense in putting all my eggs in one basket.
Maybe the bootylicious girl is crazy. Based on looks and what I know the girl is badass. Like I would not only forget about the other girls, I would lose their numbers, hell.....I would lose my entire phone. I wouldn't act like that or build her up to be one some super high pedestal. Again guys she might be crazy. Maybe she looks all hot but smokes meth on the side. Who knows.... People are crazy!
Potential Steps To Get A Swolemate
This process could be rough for anyone and there is no definitive answer. Since you are already jacked, ripped, and tan then it is going to depend on where you are from. Are there beaches? Hit the beaches and look for girls who visibly workout is one way. I live in the desert so that isn't going to work out real well. Have a gym membership at a place like LA Fitness that has multiple locations you can prowl around in. You might find some potential swolemates on Tinder and Bumble. I have matched with probably 6 or so overtime and only went out with one girl who fit the definition. It looked like there was real potential. We made out in the Applebees parking lot but somehow the situation didn't go further. We tried to reconnect at one point but then BS happened and we didn't get to hang out. She told me she can squat 225 lb and I was all about it but again guys she seemed kind of crazy in some respects. Another girl that worked out and certainly had some nice muscle structure left a very lasting impression on me. I wanted to make babies with that girl but ultimately I was just a summer flavor for her. lol
Another somewhat tougher route would be to join group fitness type places like Crossfit or a Boxing gym possibly. Those can be a lot more expensive for sure but a lot of Crossfit gyms will let you do one workout for free and you could go there and scope the situation out. Personally I think the build of some of these Crossfit chicks is the right balance for me personally. They have similar builds to pole vaulters and heptathalete chicks.
There are several issues with Crossfit gyms to me. The first being the cost. A lot of times here it will be $120 / month and you have limited hours when you can go compared to LA Fitness at $30 / month and I can go there pretty much at all hours. On top of that it isn't ideal to do cleans and snatch at LA Fitness but I can do lighter weights. I mainly don't have the ability to do heavier amounts where I would need a platform and the ability to drop the weights.
At the end of the day it is going to be real tough guys. You are looking for someone who has upper 10% genetics in the world and who is actually training hard enough to develop that potential which narrows it down to less than 1% of the population.
There will also be disappointments when you find out that some of these girls might like a guy with a dad bod and they are crazy on top of everything else. Or maybe guys are the crazy ones?
Good Luck Out There!
Are these girls too jacked for you guys?
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Good read. I was thinking about marriage and all and feel like it is unnecessary for most men. I guess if you want a family, then marriage could help in maintain security for the child, but why else?
Back in North America, I don't really hit on girls at the gym. There are too many dudes there and the girls have their defenses up. The only suitable time to approach them is if you are in a similar situation as what you described at the basketball court. It's easier to approach girls at the gym in China because you are a foreigner and people are curious about you. At the same time, most girls here come to the gym to "work out" but really aren't doing much lol. Most are on their phone while the lazily use the adductor machine or walking on the treadmill.
What you said about fit girls is true. When they go to the gym to impress, their ego becomes larger than life. I think having a relationship is really tough these days. Most people are trying to protect their pride and are dishonest in a relationship. Everybody is playing games are being shady to protect themselves from being hurt by the other.
Good luck Brian!
One thing I didn't mention in the post is that my sister was married for a year when she was about 24. Seeing that marriage go down the tubes and several others from people back in Indiana it sort of made me question marriage even more. It mainly made me not in a rush so much. But yeah I get what you are saying about maintaining security for a child but why does someone necessarily need to show that commitment by legally binding themselves through government paperwork?
I'm really happy for people who have a great marriage and it works out. But unfortunately we are seeing it less and less these days. Places like Iceland have almost all but abandoned the concept all together.
I'm with you 100% on hitting on girls at the gym. It is a tough thing and you almost have to talk to them when they are leaving in the parking lot or some other odd situation like I pulled off where she was shooting baskets. I got lucky in that regard. And I was lucky that there weren't more people trying to shoot around. It was just me and her in the gym to start out with.
I get what you are saying about the relationships for sure. In the past couple years the girls that I wanted to be more serious with were quite a bit younger. One was 21 and another was 22 and it is a little tougher to make that workout in the long run. It was fun for them for awhile but at their age they didn't want to get locked down. For whatever reason the chicks who are about 28 to 34 don't seem to workout at all. It sounds bad but even being pretty accepting red flags start flying or I feel like there isn't enough chemistry.
Before I really get locked down I need to travel the world to be honest. I think going to these places with all these travelers will be a good scene for me. I will probably meet some chicks from Canada, Australia, or Europe or something.... who knows.
Wow I never knew that Iceland has such a high rate of unwed parents. I presume things are still working well over there. Maybe they have it right.
I just don't see what benefit marriage has for a man. Sure, many women find it desirable because of the security aspect, but what about for a man? I guess if you are not confident in your ability to attract women, then it works the same way too.
Traveling helps you grow a lot. I've learned a lot in China and this is a place for men that want marriage. That's how their culture is. Many girls are hinting at marriage a couple weeks into a relationship.
Well if you notice a lot of guys get lazy as fuck when they are in a relationship or married. No one every says they want a husband bod or a dad bod. A lot of it is just being content and people let themselves go.
I will admit that once I got that Bootylicious girls phone number I stepped it up an extra notch in the gym the next few days. I can't be slacking when you are trying to be a spartan... lol
That is funny that girls hint at marriage a couple weeks into a relationship. lol I feel like 90% of people here are just "hanging out" at this point. The ones that are single that is.
Too much security can do that to people. When your relationship is secured by law, then you don't have motivation to stay on your A game. That causes people to feel lazier or not appreciate what they have. When there is that manageable bit of insecurity, you know that you can't afford to devolve like that. When you get married, sex gets a whole lot more boring for many people because of the same reason.
Yeah it is an interesting concept. It is like when someone is subsidized too much. It incentives laziness.
People don't hustle and get too comfortable living on easy street.
People in general likes an extrovert person, a "fun to be with' kind of guy who tell jokes and makes stories out of meaningless subjects, things and people or situation but girls want to know if you can support them or not. If you have a fat wallet plus a good looks then you get a greater chance to get a girl.
But in my opinion you should get a girl who loves you more then you to her.
You know what one of my friends told me. He said, "you have to find a girl who loves you more than you love her ...... because you are going to fuck up." LOL So it is right along with what you are saying. Hahha. He also said, "If it has Tits, it's crazy!" Hahhahaha He is full of hilarious quotes.
You know when girls are still young in the range of 18-25 they like a man who is handsome, has a job and rich.
Then when they turn about 25-30 years in age, they just wan a man, who has a job.
Then when they turn 35 and beyond they just want a man.
LOL. That is pretty funny. Oddly enough I'm still seeing a lot of chicks who are in their mid 30's being real picky and choosy around here. Which is odd but I don't know if they start to just tell themselves that they might not end up having kids or what.
I'm one of the three!!
I have always used a combination of my incredible physique and my even more impressive sense of humour to make em swoon into bed :0D
The sense of humour goes a long way! If you can't make them laugh you have no chance!
I think guys & girls are the crazy ones. We're all crazy. I've dated guys on all spectrum of the "hotness" categories. Confidence is always nice. But the real hot muscle gym guys are typically too confident and come across as cocky.or they can't ever find you (the girl who runs) hot enough. The flaw finding guys. On the reverse not all in shape dudes behave like that. Its all over the spectrum. Looks are definitely important. But so is attitude (or lack thereof)
It is a fine balance and really hard to nail down. Also people change overtime so even when stuff last a year, two years, 10 years....etc it is hard to say if it can keep going in a healthy manor.
Agreed. My longest relationship was 5 years and it was not proceeding in a healthy manner at all. I always love reading your stuff. You just say what we're all thinking. I can appreciate it.
Thank you! I think there is a small group of people who either openly or secretly like to see what kind of stuff I type up. LOL
There are certain subjects that I really don't make much on upvote wise typically but I can't help but to type them up. It is fun typing some of the stuff and I will start laughing. Like the whole thing about guys trying to lick the sweat off the leg press machine because a girl who they think is hot was just using it. Hahahah.
Yeah you mentioned that a couple times i was just like ..okay LOL
Mehn... I love this article...
You've really done justice to it...
Read it like twice just to take in the message...
I do hit the gym once in a while but what I haven't tried before is hiting at a female while at the gym...
For us out here in Nigeria, hustling and tryna make money is our daily gym @brainphobos cus like one of our comedian said "no girl will leave a guy with six cars, to date a guy with sixpacks" .....
Lmao...
But I really enjoyed reading this one
That is a pretty funny quote about the six cars and the sixpack. Hahhah
Jim is good for health. Gym, yoga, etc. If you have such a bayam, body and mind are tie well. Thanks to so much an Advice Share.