I often wondered what I would do when my husband went. He was given a year to live in 1998. So I always knew he would go first. But we didn’t have a car mechanic, plumber, electrician, handyman, computer repair guy, etc. He handled all of that. I did do all the finances as that was the one thing he was abysmal at. And there were all the animals and gardens and pastures.
I never had nightmares. I just wondered how I would cope.
And when it happened, we were in the middle of our 3rd build, and while I knew some stuff, I certainly didn’t know all about building a house.
So I found out what I would do. I most certainly would NOT sell the farm if there was anyway to avoid it. I found workman and had to figure out how to pay for expensive labor. I relied on friends, A LOT. (I don’t drive and we live in the country.)
I would suggest that you and he start thinking about if one of you goes first. Make a plan. If he helps create the plan, it will be like he’s there to help. (And vice versa.) Figure out what you can. You have extensive family support, use it!
Make the plans now, all the estate stuff, every single thing. It’s so much easier when it’s done well, ask me how I know…
Good morning my lovely friend. I remember when you lost your hubby and I cried for you both. You have suffered, yet you somehow pulled it together and I so admire your strength. I am so amazed how you have managed the farm, the house, which is so gorgeous, and all that you do with the gardens and phew!, just all of it.
Great advise, plan ahead, talk about what will eventually come, there is no escaping it. I have to admit, having a big family will surely carry me over my finish line too. In that, I am blessed.
Hope this finds you well and happy. you are a wonderful friend.