Lost Guts in the Rain
I still remember clearly, at that time it was drizzling in the afternoon. Ah, it wouldn't be drizzle if it didn't make my clothes soaked like I had just jumped into a pool! He-he.
Sitting alone in the corner of a coffee shop, I stared at the blinking laptop screen waiting for my fingers to type something. The deadline was only tomorrow, but my brain felt completely empty. Where did the courage to write that used to be so passionate go?
Back then... yes back then... when I was still in college, my guts were so big. I dared to write anything. Criticize the campus? Go for it! Protest government policies? Go all out! Even writing a love letter to my crush was awesome. Eeh, now? Never mind writing social criticism, just writing a Facebook status makes me think twice. "What if I say the wrong thing? What if someone is offended? What if I'm considered a know-it-all?"
Tch! Since when did my guts become this shriveled?
Maybe this is what is called "growing up". The more mature you are, the more considerations you have. The more responsibilities, the less courage. We become too careful, too afraid of making mistakes, too worried about other people's judgments. But in the past? Who cares! What's important is to write, what's important is to express!
"The coffee is cold," the shop assistant scolded me.
I smiled wryly. Yes, just like this cold coffee, enthusiasm and courage can also fade if left for too long. But can't cold coffee still be warmed up? Can't a shrunken guts still be raised again?
So on that rainy afternoon, I decided to write as it was. To hell with fear! To hell with judgment! After all, you only live once, how can you spend it constantly holding yourself back?
"Miss, please warm up the coffee," I said as I started typing.
And this writing was born, from a cup of coffee that was reheated, from the guts that slowly dared to rise again.
(By the way, it looks like tomorrow's deadline will be finished on time. Hehe.)
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I love how you turned your fear into fuel and got back to writing - sometimes all we need is a push to remind us of our own inner fire
you are absolutely right