Part of my onboarding process into the new job role will be going through a sales methodology course, which I will probably do at the end of Q2 or after summer in Q3. However, since I will be training before this, I am running through previous recordings from the sessions, hoping to glean what I can from them.
I am not much of a "formula" kind of person, meaning that I tend not to have a formalized process for the way I conduct myself, especially ones that have a host of acronyms that spell out the order. However, I do recognize the need for these for many people, especially now that my personal processes have been thrown into a little disarray. Perhaps this will be good for me to get a little bit of practice in as a refresher and perhaps some new simple tricks.
I think what I don't like about these types of processes is that they feel inauthentic to me, but as I was explaining to someone the other day, we aren't necessarily talking to the same people over and over, so what we have used or heard a thousand times, it is all fresh for them. Not only that, it can make them feel safe and build trust, because they get the sense that you have done all of this before.
There is a bit of a caveat here obviously, as for example, when taking those calls from sales people on the phone where they rush through a spiel so rapidly there is no chance of knowing what they are talking about, it doesn't give the sense that they are doing it for you, you are just next on their list of calls to make. It is obviously rehearsed, but not with any intention of engaging the listener.
Communication is a lot like dancing, where steps are learned explicitly or implicitly to build a style, but there is still a lot of room on the spectrum for better or worse. Finnish men for example tend to learn the steps of the dance, but fail to listen to the music or learn the nuances of leading their partner, which means that they go through their "spiel" without considering their partner, and even though things don't go smoothly, because they got all of their moves out, they are content - even though their dance partner is left unsatisfied.
When we interact well, there is a rhythm and a flow, speed adjustments, highs and lows, moments of close intimacy and giving space. There is a push and pull of it and the most effective communication engages more than the mind, it wraps the body into the mix. Even in remote sessions, you can see how body language changes in the cameras as to whether a person is engaged or not, but many people are so interested in getting their steps out, that they miss the signs. This is why there has to be stacked processes, where not only is there the "what to say" steps, but also the how to pay attention to the audience and adjust how it is said.
I used to be good at this, and even though I can notice it as it is happening, the adjustment processes takes a level of creativity that I don't seem to have, and my mind draws on blank. It is frustrating to say the least, but I am hoping that going through the courses throughout this year might give me some basic steps to fallback on, even if I believe it is the robotic way to communicate.
Essentially though, whether the processes I use are created by me or another, it is a type of programmed performance, making it robotic, with the difference being whether I am the programmer, or the programmed. But, for those who are not interested in developing this for themselves, I do recommend seeking out communication development training of some kind, whether formal or self-directed, as being able to communicate well really does go a long way in this life.
Looking back, one of the things I should have focused more on is my communication skills across more domains, especially when it comes to listening. It is not that I was bad at it, but I could have been far better at picking up the slight changes in people's tones or, picking out particular indicative words. These days, I can barely keep up with understanding them, let alone analyzing all of the components on the fly and building an effective response - at least that is how I feel.
Even in writing it is hard to get the words right and I find commenting on Hive far more challenging than it was earlier, as the processes that were connecting brain to fingertips seem to be largely broken, or missing pieces that break the chain of my communication.
While this particular training isn't going to be the thing that realigns my processes, perhaps it will be motivating enough through result that I will self-learn again. Motivation is low in this area currently, which I partly put down to so many other things going on simultaneously, but I think I am also just not very motivated in general at the moment. At least when it comes to some things.
Just like dancing, it is hard to do when not "feeling it".
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
Thank you again for another insightful read @tarazkp.
I have been in the process of learning communication for a while now. I have read books and seen a lot of videos. I even took a course on it.
I can say I have significantly improved. But I never reasoned that someone could regress in his grasp of such skills... I always thought it to be a skill that stays... For life..
Thank you once again.
That's great. Have you been actively applying what you have learned?
Well, like any skill, it needs to be practiced and there are changes in culture and social habit, so it has to be adjusted over time too. However, the reason for me is that I had a stroke about 8 months ago and it "broke" parts of my cognitive ability, so I have to build new processes to account for it.
I wouldn't say actively...
I have been caught up trying to be as good a doctor as I can be. So I haven't actually been intentional about applying the things I have learnt. I feel like I might just start afresh, take copious notes and act aggressively.
I am so sorry about that..@tarazkp.
I hope you were able to make a full recovery?
Sometimes I think that I am good at communicating with writing than speaking. Perhaps, it is due to my work style.
What kind of work do you normally do?
Writing financial reports.
The Finnish male dancers got my eyes wide open.
Communication has to do with two instead of one.
One of the fundamental elements of lesson in our daily dealings is communication.
Attracted?
I think it has to do with their learning style - they are good book learners here - lots of engineers. The thing is with physical skills though, no matter how much you read, it isn't enough to know.
Certainly attracted, lol.
That's certainly copy and paste, and reading isn't enough.
When we communicate with others, we must realize folks listen and understand differently. It is not a one size fits all. Words express, yes. However I find words can also restrict what we say. Folks don't listen enough. We were given two eyes, two ears, two hands, two lips yes... but we have only one tongue that can heal or destroy.
Admittedly, my own listening skills have always needed work - now they need a full overhaul!
There are many ways to listen to the environment, but I have met some people who are completely deaf in every way.
You made me think about that “Lie to me” movie that teaches me more about reading people than all my courses. Is the attitude the focus and the attention to details that makes the difference.
I struggle with the attention a lot these days - especially for extended periods of time.
There is a funny exercise I used to do when I started the memory training. First use a ping pong ball, all white side. Close your eyes and recreate it and maintain it in your mind inner space. Keep it there as much as you can. Reaching 3-5 minutes is brutal. The end of this exercise is when you memorize the room where you are, and recreate it completely in your mind (I have many many books, imagine that). I heard of people that recreate whole rooms, apartments or houses, and even school buildings. The legend says that one once recreate it her whole city. and maintain it. The creation is easy, the maintainance is hard. Do not worry, after you graduate from ping pong ball you can use apple, oranges (I found the round shape helps me). Do it consistently and you build some crazy attention and focus given enough time.
This is interesting. I have always been fascinated by the idea of building a "memory palace" but I haven't the patience for it. Have you noticed the effects are lasting or does your memory regress without constant practice?
as you stop training, some percentage is lost, but not completely. randomly saying, if I got my skills up to 300%, 3 times better, after not training for a while they are going down to 200%, but still above what you got when you started. still, this is more a visualization and focus exercise more than a memory training.
Nice article shared and have learnt more on communication
All human affairs go through communication. Everything is language: art, music, literature, dance is expression that seeks to be heard and understood by others and is a relationship that seeks the response that comes from those who understand the message. The most important is the one we establish with ourselves, like you now.
Great comment!
The only problem is that this is on Hive, not that shithole Steemit! :)
Lol!
Haha
you are three comments in...
if there is a fourth, I might flag you. Automated or not, this is just useless spam.