As I said before I'm going to try something different.
Step out of the comfort zone and roll with the flow.
I was working on another post and it just wouldn't work for me. Instead of spending days on that frustrating thing... Hashing over every flaw and picking at every mistake until I want to throw my computer across the room.
Instead
Tonight I went for a walk.
It was getting down to those hours of dusk where you can comfortably count the setting sun by degrees. Those strange almost surreal moments of the evening when everything seems to have slowed down to the pace of the crickets chirping.
As I walked through my own tiny little village in the middle of nowhere I could feel a change in my mood. Before I set out I was argumentative, a bit anxious and highly agitated. A strange mood for me to be in at any time and one I cant really place a cause to.
Even the sunflowers were feeling the mood.
Now as the sky above me turned down the colors by a notch I gradually let myself calm down. A few cigarettes and maybe a half mile later, the nicotine and smells of pending autumn had done their job.
I began to take note of scenes and images around these familiar areas for the first time. It sounds bizarre to say that for the first time in all the years I have lived here I noticed my surroundings.
The contrasts, the differences and the changes that had occurred over the last 16 years struck me. The people who we started our journey with and those of us who remained.
The Contrast!
Modernized bungalows standing next to tumbledown farmhouses, planted fields next to endless miles of forest and fallow land.
The Sky. That endless incredible expanse above head that somehow seems to fade into the background. Becoming the stage for so many of our photos and stories.
Simple things, Everyday things. Still somehow taking on an atmosphere comparable to that of a church, or the holy grounds of our long gone predecessors.
Step by step.
One foot in front of the other.
Onwards.
This here's the village announcement board. Fetes, Local Parties and shindigs get put on here. I forgot how long its been since the covid times put a stop to those.
Anyways... Onwards.
The feel of the road and grass under foot, the smell of corn and sunflowers slowly reaching their end of days, a mixture of decay and sweet ripeness, harvest time.
The contrast between the endless sky and the mixed concrete pillars and wooden poles holding the lines and lights that connect us to the outside world.
By Now I couldn't help but wonder if that same connectivity and Light on demand has been what's kept me from simply being in my surroundings all this time.
Or it could be simply because I never stopped to take the time to look around without a goal or purpose in mind.
Always somewhere to go, something to do, a reason or purpose behind my comings or goings.
Tonight I can say that I looked, I listened and simply put, I was there.
While being there in itself didn't make my surroundings special, it made me appreciate how special my surroundings were.
I took the time to actually see the small corner of the world I live in and appreciate it for what it was.
Flawed, Humble and in a word beautiful.
Life and death at every turn.
Here in this small village we are slowly turning away from a history that will soon be forgotten into a more modern and accessible way of life.
The local patois or regional dialect is fading, The empty houses are gradually falling back into the earth they were constructed from. The simple pleasures of our forebears are being replaced with instant achievable wants rather than hard won needs.
Progress? Maybe.
Depressing? Possibly.
But for now, In this moment I'm going to stop. Listen to the screech of the owls and the wind pushing the cobs of corn from their final perch to the earth where some will surely seed and grow next year.
Watch the sun gradually give way to the stars, moon and the occasional street lamp.
I will enjoy this brief moment of clarity before I return to my old reality.
That up there is the end of my walk, that street light marks the entrance to my home, and my family.
I am slightly sad that my little walk has ended for now, but the fact that I have a home and my family to return to makes the return an equally happy occasion.
This is strange to write about, and perhaps I cant really describe what this felt like for me. I am not a changed man, I haven't become wiser or a better person for taking a walk.
I am simply more aware of what's around me. For that I am grateful.
Sometimes the smallest things can be viewed from a different angle, even a dried out old weed on the blacktop. In that lies the true beauty of what I learned tonight.
Well I'll be completely honest, this was not the post I thought I would be putting up tonight but here it is anyway. Day 2 of My post a day challenge, Still going, Still making an effort.
Today I decided I'm going to have a bit of fun on this 30 posts in 30 days. I'm going to do a post 31, and a giveaway on the 31st post, cause some months have 31 days or so I've been told.
In spite of my rough and ready appearance I'm an Antique dealer don't ya know.
So it'll probably be old shit in your mailbox.
Stay tuned engage down below . For every post from day 1 you comment on you will get one entry and a chance to win.
Then at the end of the 30 posts, on day 31 There will be a random raffle with a chance to win....
Really cool old shit.
Ill call that a win. Thanks for making it down here and have a good one.
I see you doing some jazz now! Good job, tha cat is landing on its feet! Day 1 in the box!
having a go, trying the angles. Ill see how the jazz works out as I go along. Thanks for checking in buddy.
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Wipe your ass with your raffle.
Never did figure out why I used to lead the joint in downvotes
31 days. That's gangster, you'll gain decent fraction with that effort. I went 7 days twice. That was more than two years ago. Other than that I'm 1 or 2 every week or two. So good on you ol'cowboy! Maybe I won't miss any, I enjoyed this one. Funny what happens when a buncha dipshits pretend they can write ain't it?
I keep hearing about covwhatever it's called over there. Meanwhile in Tennessee, USA:
Your charming personality? 😁
Aye the states seems to be alot more chill about it. Here they're all still masked up for shopping,school etc.
As for the raffle, I'll write it on toilet paper then. Printer papers too crispy.
31 didn't seem so hard in concept, starting to look like a lot haha, but fuck it in for a penny.
I laughed enough at your opening question I wrote this before proceeding. Ima go see what else you said now.
I'm back. Don't let your own self down now, you said 31. 30 is disappointing and 32 is showing off. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised with the traction you find at the end. If I miss some it's nothing personal.
👊🏼
Cheers for keepin an eye on me. I'm hoping for some traction and maybe more importantly to get used to actually writing without spending so long editing. I figure its a good motivator. Well here's hoping, I'll do my best not to disappoint or show off.
👊
This is an excellent start: keep going and you'll find the rhythm
Glad you got out and spent some time just looking around at the place. Sometimes that’s the easiest but at the same time most difficult thing to do! We are focusing on technology and all that but we often forget the simple ness around us! Glad you got to enjoy that, some never do!
Posting daily is a bit challenging. You eventually find a rhythm of what works for you. I like to switch things up and post about all kinds of shit. I’m now on 10 months straight of posting once a day at least. It’s a strange feeling but I’m managing to keep it going to I enjoy that. One of the good things I’ve found is to have at least one day a week you can dedicate to something specific. For me it’s music Monday. I know that Monday I can relax a bit with some music but also not have to figure out what post to finish.
Another big thing is scheduling posts. That’s helped me a lot! I try to schedule posts 1-2 days out so I’m not trying to slam through them just to get it done. I write a few posts in a day then schedule them to post at the same time each different day. That’s helped me because you can then schedule some and come back the following day to write another one or two and just keep it going.
Thats some great advice! Ill look into making a rhythm as I work it out. As it stands I do what I can to get the next post started as soon as I finish, then polish it up and edit to the best of my abilities the next day.
I usually have a few ideas in the pipe at a time so Can manage to finish a post. still getting the hang of the daily posting tho!
One of my issues is drowning in draft posts lol. I have anywhere between 4-10 drafts at a time. It's hard to sit down and finish some of the longer ones. I love doing it but it's a little daunting sometimes hehe.
The rhythm is good and feels right once you get into one.
You were strong enough to do what I have been trying to push myself to do for months now- get off the computer for a minute and get out, get some fresh air to clear for brianfog away.
And I have had a couple of halfarsed attempts, which have been quite fruitful in terms of capturing and collecting content for my posts, aswell as giving me a fresher perspective (atleast visually anyway..)
So good on you for doing it and so glad that you were able to appreciate the little things, the every, otherwise, hidden, unseen, neglected and faded things around you!
I too need to pull my finger out and do it again soon too!
Thanks for stopping by, it's hard sometimes to take a bit of time and just have a wander around.But I think it's equally important to take the time to get out of the day to day mindsets. At least it felt great to me.
Have a good one!
Totally agree and usually do it, always advise everyone else to do it, but having a hard time doing it myself now...it's these cold, gray days- when its supposed to be spring...
Plus I did it all everywhere last year during lockdown too and I'm sicking of walking the same paths and taking the same photos...
Anyway, first world worries...
You too take care and have a great weekend!