Let me preface this by saying that I completely value and appreciate all women. This piece is not meant to demean anyone.
Last weekend I attended the 2018 Women’s March in Los Angeles and Las Vegas. It was an interesting experience to say the least. Besides essentially being co-opted by the Democratic Party, the march was also a celebration of women and their concerns. Some of these women wore Pink Pussy hats and carried signs that said “This pussy grabs back!”, a reference to a recording of Donald Trump talking about grabbing women “by the pussy”.
These women took Trump’s ignorance and disrespect language towards women and attempted to take power away from him by making the phrase their battle cry. Even before Donald Trump came along, the word pussy was thrust in the American consciousness in 2014 when a single man inspired the viral “Fuck Her Right in the Pussy” meme. The truth is that pussy is deeply woven into the fabric of American culture.
While at the march I overheard a man tell another man something along the lines of “I can’t stand the word pussy!”. The second man nodded in agreement as the first explained that he thought the word so deplorable that he would never say it in front of his wife. This got me thinking about the use of the word in general. My hope with writing this piece is to open the door to conversations about how men and women feel about the word and in which context it ought to be used (if at all).
First, let’s define pussy. Although sometimes used to describe a feline, the two most popular uses of the word pussy are usually in reference to calling someone weak or cowardly, or to a woman’s sex organs.The Free Dictionary states, “though it is possibly not quite as taboo for most people as the c-word (cunt), many still consider this item out of bounds in normal conversation and writing”. The top definition on Urban Dictionary defines pussy as “something warm, wet, snuggly and sometimes furry that you can eat and still fuck it afterwards. The only thing I know that can bleed for seven days and not die.” And used in a sentence… “I ate her pussy and then fucked it.”
So let’s go back to the two guys. I wonder which definition they were using that was so disgusting the word could not be said aloud? Maybe they simply find the sound of the word to be offensive or uncomfortable? It seemed like the men were worried how using such a word would be received in front of women. So when is it acceptable to say pussy??
In my view, it’s ignorant to use the word pussy to refer to a weak person and a woman’s vagina. If we accept the use of the word pussy as a way to describe a woman’s vagina then using it as a description of something weak is bullshit. If I feel the need to call someone weak I think I will just call them weak or a wimp or something equally silly. Pussies are strong. Among other things, pussies bring human beings into this world and provide pleasure for all kinds of men and women. So if we are not using the word to describe weakness is there any other occasion which calls for the controversial word? Obviously some people enjoy using the word in a sexual context but that will vary person to person. If the word is communicated with respect and consent then I see nothing wrong. I cannot speak as one with a pussy, but I speak as one who appreciates pussy. (Full Disclosure: I may be known to use the word in the bedroom on occasion.)
The reality is that since all value is subjective there are billions of individual perspectives on the use of the word pussy. I am more interested in hearing comments and thoughts on why you do or do not use the word than moralizing about the dangers of pussy. What do you think???
(BTW if you are offended by this why are you still reading?)
I am an investigative journalist and liberty activist; a Lead Investigative Reporter for ActivistPost.com and the founder of the TheConsciousResistance.com & The Houston Free Thinkers. I have also co-authored three books with @johnvibes: The Conscious Resistance: Reflections on Anarchy and Spirituality and Finding Freedom in an Age of Confusion, Vol. 1 and Finding Freedom in an Age of Confusion, Vol. 2
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To be honest I prefer the word cunt to pussy but realise that I am probably in a minority here.
:)
That said I don't generally find offensive words offensive ~ they are just a string of letters and, ultimately, to be offended or not is a choice.
However context is key. I tend to swear for humour and added punctuation and prefer to argue my point without using bad language.
Each to their own.
xox
I wrote a piece about the word Fuck, a while back, here which may be of interest.
Cunt is a fantastic word. But I'm from Ireland where people often greet their best friends by calling them a cunt. We even use that cunting word as a verbal adjective at times.
It really is a great word though, even just the sound of it. I wish I had enough knowledge of linguistics and psychology to explain exactly why cunt is such a great word.
You know there are lots of words like this. What has happened is semantics. It is intentional and it is part of the reason everyone is so divided about everything. Fag used to be a Cigarette. Gay used to be happy. Cheater used to mean an officer to look after a kings land. Egregious used to mean extremely good. Girl used to mean a young child or person of either sex.
http://mentalfloss.com/article/61876/11-words-meanings-have-changed-drastically-over-time
These are just a few I have found looking. My wife and I talk about this subject often because in legal term words have a defined definition and that definition is written down to make sure everyone understands. In Blacks legal Dictionary you will find out how many words have exact meanings that are contrary to what you thought they meant!
"In my view, it’s ignorant to use the word pussy to refer to a weak person and a woman’s vagina."
Only if it's ignorant to use the word dick to refer to someone who's an asshole as well as a man's penis.
fair enough. But I don't think the two words have a similar history in how they were used. I haven't looked into this, just my initial feeling.
Yes I dont like these words or how they are used to weak or stupid, I'll use the words in a joke context or where appropriate, otherwise I think its better to speak/talk and act maturely when discussing serious things
What does the history matter? Why do women get special privileges that they're reproductive organs are not to be spoken ill of or used in any negative way, where it's okay to do this to men? Females get privilege then march around talking about male privilege. It's eye-rollingly boring.
I absolutely agree with this comment....The same people who scream blue murder and constantly censor people who they deem to be demeaning and sexist, are the same ones who constantly use the directly equivalent words to say things that are 'socially acceptable', at this moment in space time, or in the right type of atmosphere and audience. It's called being a hypocrite, and I bet there were a lot of those at the women's march (both male and female).
This type of behaviour happens constantly in social situations, but everyone agrees that's it's hilarious when it's directed one way, but completely unacceptable the other way. Isn't that the entire point of the 'sexism' and 'equality' meme? Because I seriously think it's just becoming a meme rather than, actually changing peoples attitudes. Another divide and conquer tactic, really.
This is great. I was thinking about this very same thing about a year ago. People often do use the word pussy to call someone weak. I told my husband that doesn't make any sense as a pussy is strong, it gives birth and we don't fall on the floor in pain with a flick of a finger. Perhaps if someone finds the need to call someone weak with a piece of anatomy, it should be a ball sack.
At any rate, we live in a time of great offense and I'll say whatever I want.
To be perfectly fair I believe the usage of "pussy" to mean someone weak or cowardly came from its usage to describe a cat as they are often quick to run from confrontation. I believe it originated as "scared little pussy cat" and shifted from that to "scared little pussy" and finally over to just "pussy".
Personally if I were ever so inclined to call someone a pussy I'm thinking of the stereotypical scared cat, not a woman's vagina, those things are wonderful (as you said, they give birth and the process leading to birth ain't so bad either).
I guess it is only lost in translation when people cease being exposed to literature which is far more a window into the past than any televised or multimedia presentation could ever hope to be.
Isn't it interesting how everyone takes different meaning from words? I would never associate it with a cat, but only with anatomy when used in a derogatory manner. While I read quite a bit, I can't say I have ever read or looked into the origin of phrases. When I come across them randomly, I think it's quite fascinating.
When we had cats we actually named them Puss...Black Puss, Ivy Puss, Big Puss, ha ha! My son got in trouble at school for saying the name of his cat. Needless to say, we had a talk with his teacher about how she shouldn't teach young children meanings of bad words when they think it just means a cat.
I would have to agree on this. I literally associate pussy to a cat. How many other words are made convoluted? You never know until you look into the history of it.
One thing I'd like to point out regarding the use of the word pussy to refer to somebody who is weak is that it shares it's origin more with the feline meaning than the female genitals meaning.
And here's Merriam-Webster to back up my assertion a little bit. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pussycat
So, yeah, I'm still going to call someone a pussy if they are acting like a pussy.
And I'd like to add to this...vaginas don't act any kind of way because they are a piece of anatomy, so in my mind calling someone a pussy or saying they are acting like a pussy will always evoke a cat and not a vagina.
I agree. I've always associated this term with pussycat.
You can expect this thing only from idiots
I almost exclusively use the word pussy in a sexual connotation and is also my wife's preferred term for her and other women's vaginas. And if I do use the word pussy to refer to someone being lame or weak I definitely have the image of a cat in mind, however as you stated I will likely just call them weak or lame. Maybe even pathetic. Yeah, I think pathetic is my favorite word to use in the situations that a lot of people use pussy in.
I've never really thought of the word pussy as a bad thing, or a pet peeve (along with the word moist, which makes some people squeamish). I've always liked the word pussy, as a cat it's cute, as a vagina, why not?
When I was in high school/college I would jokingly tell my guy friends to 'grow some ovaries', because as women, our genitalia is not out danging in the wind making a delicate target of itself. And honestly, I can't help but think that men's genitalia make much better insults than women, which could be taken as a complement instead of an insult if taken literally, because they gift the world with orgasms and the creation of humans. For example, to me calling someone a pussy, sounds less negative than calling someone a sack of scrotum.
This is awesome, lol. I think most men use it, coming from a forceful approach, at least in my experience. It grosses me out when they say they wanna 'stick it in my pussy'... being a compassionate empathic sort of creature, this just never sounds like a good thing, and almost immediately turns me off of the idea of sleeping with someone... but WHY? I think because I relate it to memories of guys who just kinda took what they want... "to get some pussy"... when I am so much more than just a sopping wet thing to acquire and brag to friends about LOL
This post totally makes me want to call someone a ballsack lol
Sometimes I hate how a word can have so many different meanings, especially when learning a new language. Like why can't each fucking word have it's own meaning? That's weak ass pussy sauce!