The Game's A Bogey

in #life7 years ago (edited)

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The little boom is precisely one month old. The last four weeks have been full of joy, terror and sleepless nights and I have loved every bit of them. However, they have flown in and tomorrow I am faced with heading back to work for the man.

I could lie and say I am cool with that and my career is ever so important to me but... I won't.

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I drifted through the day occasionally glowering at people and being grumpy. All the while my gigantic brain rotated ceaselessly inside my skull as it tried to come up with a solution.

I know!

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I could rob a bank! A strictly non-violent robbing of course. Perhaps I would walk up to the teller and rattle of a few classic boom jokes followed by some euphemisms for genitalia?

Hmm, that has the potential of jail time no matter how non-violent I was and besides. Who wants to come into contact with all that greasy FIAT. I might get hives.

Well, I suppose if it wasn't to be FIAT I would have to look at crypto. My muse and my nemesis.

How could I raise enough crypto to not have to work ever again?

I know!

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I could lease lots of SP from blocktrades or minnowbooster and unleash an army of bots on steemit all with the express purpose of voting me up so I could live like a lord!!

Hmm, no. That wouldn't really work either. For a start it would cost a fortune.

There must be another way.

I know!

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I would invest in some ICOs! Surely there must be some out there that would offer me a quick buck of a return if i just shot my full muck into it?

I had a look at the ones currently doing the rounds. Even an idiot would be hard put not to realise that they were rubbish and a baw-hair away from being scams.

Sigh

It looked like there was no other option. With a heavy heart, I went to my wardrobe and pulled out a couple of jazzy shirts. Off to the ironing board with me. The good lady patted me sympathetically on the arm.

We will miss you.

I tried not to start wailing. After all I was only going back to work. It wasn't like I was going to the gallows or anything.

I had only gone a few steps past her when I whirled around...

I've got it baby! I've got the answer!

What is it? Tell me!

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Genesis Mining!! I will dump all of our spare cash into Genesis Mining and we can live off the handsome profits that pour in each month!

We held each others gaze for a few seconds before we both burst out laughing. The good lady slapped her thigh as tears of hilarity streamed down her cheeks.

Oh god, I think I am going to shit out a kidney!

She gasped.

I might laugh up a lung!

I cried.

The laughter eventually subsided. We had a hug. She ruffled my hair.

At least you can still laugh dawgy.

Yeah lass. If we don't have laughter we ain't got nothing.

I resumed my journey to the ironing board with my jazzy shirts, my heart not quite so heavy.

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Thank you for posting @meesterboom.

Lovely illustrations and expression of self's inner turmoil in your writing.

htooms has a contest running.....perhaps that will at least make the pain bearable..... ^_^

Wishing you and yours all the best. Cheers.

Oh really!! It's been a while. I will get right over.

Thanks for visiting @bleujay, it is fair to say I am feeling the anguish tonight!

I suggest if you want to rob a bank, best way to do this is to own the bank 😂😂😂

I'll hope Steem will one time give you the opportunity to never have to work again while enjoying other peoples work and receiving the curation awards!

I hope that's what we all get out of it!!

I found this short vid, instantly I thought about you;

http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/7281457/cdc5c36c/biertje_.html

Lol, I was terrified to look at it as it looked like a mad link! I am too safety conscious!

I thought the automated beer-serving-bot was awesome, but i coudnt get the vid to play here straightaway. Otherwise i would have for sure!

I think an automated beer serving bot would be hella awesome!

If I understand you dear friend @meesterboom, how hard it is to return to work after a long vacation, I had the same thing and the worst is that this feeling lasts several days, until you enter rhythm, but you say who would earn so much money for no more work
I'm so sorry, dear friend. I wish you a good stay in your work

Thanks @jlufer! It will be a tough first day I am sure but hopefully will settle down :O)

The pain of returning to work :( As a teachers of the ways of music, my summers are my own. Come Sept. "Tears, they flow like the river" - sing with me now!

I joined Steemit in late July and quickly moved into full-addict-mode. By the beginning of Sept. the last thing on my mind were those budding young musicians in need of proper musical guidance. I put on my bigboy pants (which I had abandoned in late July) and made my slug-march back to work.

I feel your pain my friend. Join in from the back row, "Nobody knows the troubles I've seen, nobody knows but Steemit." Can I get and Amen?!?!

Amen!!

I am trying to find my big boys pants in time for the morrow. Sigh!

Cheers though, you bought a smile to my face! :0)

I hummed along, and threw in the sop descant, but I'm not feeling sorry for you, Bucky! As we run our own business, we don't get holidays unless we can bribe one of my nephews to come and hold the fort for a few days. We get a stay-cation of a few days at Xmas, but even then we once had someone ring up on Boxing Day (?!?) to ask questions about one of our products. I've been thinking longingly of what it would be like to spend all summer lazing out...

I thought that being your own boss meant that you could take holidays whenever you wanted ;) hahaha

I was self employed for years and have a closet full of those t-shirts.... and pants.

You're a lucky one, boom!

Hehe, sometimes I think so :O)

Do people still physically rob banks? I thought you just hacked in these days and transferred everything to an offshore account in the Caymens.

Now aren't you some kind of computer guy? 🤔

Sssshh, the bank job was just a cover story thrown out into the ether ;O)

What's not to like about jobs, come on man!
Annoying bosses, grumpy clients, weird co-workers.. it's just amazing lol

It IS amazing!!

Oh I loves it I loves it!! I wish I could go in tonight!!!!

;O)

Has it already been a month? Wow, where did that time go? Hoping your first day back goes well ... and I'm sure you'll be rushing back home as soon as possible for some family time. All the best, Uncle Boom! :)

Cheers lass! I know, it went in the blink of an eye.

I'm not ready!! Waaah waaaaahh!

Just keep on steeming baby, I see early retirement in your future ;)

I am chuckling at that. Oh if only! Save me Steem!! Save me! :OD

For our winter business my hubby spends most of his days out in the vineyards, sometimes tromping through knee high snow (I do it too, just not consistently--and only one year did I ever brave the worst of the weather). We make good money from it, but it's WORK and I can tell you he thinks steem-and some other good crypto investments- may be his ticket out. It ain't out of the realm of possibility ;)

Incidentally, he starts work tomorrow. At least it's not snowing yet :)

All hail the lack of snow for as long as possible then!

I like to think that too. It would be amazing is set all stumbled across this life changing thing wouldn't it. Not having to do two work would be magic

Good luck for your first day back - sigh I would also rather prefer not working but some thing we just have to do - I still have a dream that one day I will just steem

Let's hold onto that dream, we gotta have something

Genesis Mining!? AHAHA! What a hoot! Oh you... Your house would definitely not be the same without you. I'm sure the hilarity you bring to your home would be terribly missed. I just hope, for your sake, that the little lady and The Mountain still remember you when you get back. Now go, dude. Go. I can't even... Don't make me hold back the tears. Just make sure you remember to bring home some bacon. Bring home the bacon, Boomdawg.

Genesis!!!

I'm bringing home the genesis bacon!!! Lolz!

Aaah, now that would be folly! I'm off to bring home the real bacon, *sigh"

le sigh is right. But, that's better that bringing home no bacon. Don't worry, dude. Once STEEM skyrockets some time next year, the bacon will come to you without you needing to chase after it. Yes, I'm being realistic. Only a few days left before December so yeah..

I think you are being one hundred percent realistic. It is my job to believe such things. I leave the rest to fate

I really want to leave the rest to fate, and fate to rest, but I fear that fate is weary. And, as we know, there is no rest for the weary. I have faith that fate will understand.

And in that at least we have faith don't we? Don't we?

That we do, brother man. That we do. YEEEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWWW Preach, brother! Preach!

I feel so sorry for you, but in our days men did not get any leave after a baby was born. Believe me the wife need them but he just has to go to work. Hope you have a awesome day and my you get home as early as you can. Love your posts thanks everyday.

I love your replies! I am counting down the minutes till I can escape!

I could lease lots of SP from blocktrades or minnowbooster and unleash an army of bots on steemit all with the express purpose of voting me up so I could live like a lord!!

Hmm, no. That wouldn't really work either. For a start it would cost a fortune.
Well I guess you have to give some space to fortune xD So go lease :D

Haha, cannot afford to lease enough!

Come on, you are a whale xD

Lol, if only I was even a fifth of a whale :O)

plies one vote Beginning Mining!? AHAHA! What a hoot! Gracious you... Your home would not be the same without you. I'm certain the silliness you convey to your home would be horribly missed. I simply trust, for your purpose, that the little woman and The Mountain still recall you when you get back. Presently go, fella. Go. I can't even... Try not to influence me to keep down the tears. Simply ensure you make sure to bring home some bacon. Make a few bucks, Boomdawg.

Trying my best to earn a few dude! :O)

I'll give you the secret of a successful bank robbery (You should like this being a beer lover)

A guy walked into a bank in Cambridge Mass with a paper bag and the remote from an old TV. He hands the teller a note saying he wants the money and if anyone follows, he'll blow up the bank. The bomb squad arrives after the guy is gone and inside of the bag are two 16 oz Budweiser cans. They never caught him... So if you need a few extra bucks...

Lol, that's smashing but that has jail time written all over it!! Apart from that lucky dude that is!!

So, am I to take away from this post that you are opening a Dry-Cleaning business that focuses on ironing jazzy shirts?

That sounds like a tremendous plan!!!

Done. I can't think of anything better. I shall be my own man!!!

C'mon buddy, there must be a 'get rich quick scheme' that fits.
Fancy helping me sell some London landmarks to tourists?

My kind of plan. If it worked once .. :0D

My life when I go to work...

It ain't good!

Thanks for a good smile today, @meesterboom!

😄😇😄

@creatr

Always a pleasure mate!

Este mes te acostumbraste a estar en casa con tu bebe, por eso se torna duro regresar nuevamente al trabajo. Bendiciones..amigo

Lo sé, pica un poco. ¡pobre de mí!

Just wait for retirement mode ;)

I've only got a hundred odd I can't retire!! Double lol!!

If you've got jazzy shirts, and snazzy pants, what more do you need?

I might need some funky shoes!

How could I forget the funky shoes? Now you have the complete outfit.

Ama gonna be impo'tant! ;0)

Hey man, I feel for you! I'm sure though that your family appreciates you slugging it out for them!

I know they do, it must be an age thing. The older I get the more I resent being parted from them!

Amazing greatings bro

And to you!

wonderful post

aw chico!
cheer up :)
thanks for the lol
how do you shit a kidney? hmmm... cooked or raw? lol
and how do you laugh a lung ? I can't imagine
if you decide to rob a bank .. and you need an accomplice ... uhmmm
you know my twitter lol don't call me ahahahha

Dream big. I followed a rainbow this weekend to photograph, and it eventually led to a used kitchen supply store.

I know it's painful today...our hearts go out to you. Just pretend you're on Steemit while at your desk. Write some more jokes about the odd-folk workers around your cubie, and day drink & dream of some of those exhotic beers you so eloquently post about. That might help.

If not, conjur up some BabyBoom dreams while napping in the broom closet to clear the lack-o' sleep webs, so you can get the Higgenbottom account done correctly when you return to the desk. Good luck, we're all pulling for you. (Think you should post some snazzy shirt snaps)