maybe one day you can learn about the techniques of muhasabah and muraqabah, you can practice it, he is not much different from what you have learned, maybe just different in belief of life after death, existence of heaven and hell, I happened from religious family of religion, but I do not obey religion, ha ha ha,
then I am sent to the school of theology and sharia, (I met my wife there). I can practice some, but my soul is calm, I also like you, there is anger, but I muffle it with Sufi practice, thank you for sharing with me
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