SAM Saturday is a great challenge by @bluemoon where we can all learn something new about each other. I love seeing these posts and learning more about my friends. SAM challenge rules
When cancer began to zap Jim's energy and we had begun spending quiet days at home I was looking for something that we could do together besides sit and watch TV on cold weather days and I bought a couple of jigsaw puzzles.
This one was challenging and kept both of us engaged and everyone who stopped in to visit and spend time with Jim spent a bit of time finding a puzzle piece and had a conversation topic that didn't focus on sickness and drugs.
When the weather warmed up we spent much more time out on the screen porch, but there was always a puzzle on the table in various stages of completion.
And then the days grew cold again and he was no longer able to get out of bed and for 4 months we had hospice coming in each morning. Having a puzzle to work on gave me something to do and still remain quietly at his bedside as he drifted in and out of a drug induced sleep.
By the time Christmas came we knew the end was getting closer, but all the kids and grandkids spent every minute they could here and we all worked on puzzles to be quietly in the same room with Jim and nearby if he needed anything.
This is the last puzzle that we did.
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Puzzles are very theraputic in times of life that we endure. I also have done puzzles in times like yours. Those puzzles look like fun with a challenge.
Love
I haven't done a puzzle since I found eSteem, but I have two new ones that were gifts, and I may get started on one again as the days get colder.
Oh, my dear Melinda. I'm so sorry to hear this. And such a beautiful story about love and dedication. I'm sure he treasured every moment you were by his side.
Why life must be so complicated and tough?
This is a very intimate story. Thank you for sharing it with us. There are so many things we could learn from it. 😘
And the puzzles look great.
Thanks so much for your kind comment, Roxy. I'm realizing how much I missed while my kids were here visiting this weekend. I guess I didn't realize I had gotten quite so far behind! It was such a horrible time. And yet I have so many wonderful memories from it. I did keep something of a journal from those days and I'm really glad I have it now. It's pretty amazing how your mind blocks out the pain.
I totally understand you, Melinda. I had my share of grief 16 years ago when I lost my father. The next year, both my grandparents followed their son. My grandma was taken away by cancer. She wasbin so much pain that when she finally found her peace, we were grateful she is not suffering anymore.
Thos were very hard times and somehow my mind blocked those memories. Now I just remember the good old times when we were together.
Time has a great healing power and a strange way to fix things. And we just have to continue... We owe it to them, right? 🙂
It is vood you kept a diary. I believe it was very helpful.
You have had more than your share. Thank you for understanding, and I'm sorry that you do. It's a tough lesson.
Yes, it is. I was very young back then and I had to learn so many things, cope with so many changes. But it's ok now. What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, right? 🙂
Whenever you need to talk to somebody, I'm here for you. Never forget.
That is so kind of you! And you are so right. It does make you stronger! And makes you realize how incredible the whole process of life is and how the life lessons never stop coming.
Lovely story. And great idea. A way to put visitors at ease, draw them in. I'm sure it was helpful for everyone especially effective with younger kids. Being there is what its all about. Nice that the family was able to be there with you and with Jim. And thank you for sharing @melinda010100
Toward the end the kids all arranged to have one day off of work during the week so that they could be here in case we needed help. It was good for all of us to have so much time together.
my boys both flew into Minneapolis when my wife's mom was in the hospital. its unfortunate, but the family isn't together that much these days. they enjoyed the family time. like you said good for everyone but in very difficult times
Especially difficult for children to go through the death of a grandparent. It's usually the first time they are close to someone who is dying. And that makes it very hard for everyone.
I'm so sorry for your loss. What a thoughtful way to allow visitors to quietly visit and support Jim, you, and all of your family. It would put them at ease and give you someone to talk to while still being there if he needed anything. Thank you for sharing such a deeply personal story.
My Chicago kids were up for the weekend and I'm realizing how far behind I got in answering comments. Thank you so much for your kind words. I really do appreciate it.
It is always nice to have a visit from your kids!!! I love to spend time with mine.
I can't even imagine how you and your family felt during this difficult time and I don't know what I would do to get trough it, but seeing all the puzzles you did together is showing me great strength and love that help you to get trough 🌸💖🌸
Thank you, my friend. There were many days where Jim would be alert enough to tell the kids that there was absolutely no reason for them to come just to watch him sleep. And they would be able to say 'quit worrying about it Dad, I just came over to help work on the puzzle'. I think it gave him comfort to hear us right there beside him.
howdy this evening Melinda...I'm not a very emotional person but that brought tears to my eyes! God bless you.
Thanks, luv. After I posted it I worried that it might have been too melancholy. I'll return to being upbeat tomorrow!
well I think those kind of post ultimately have the effect of counting our blessings and treasuring every day that we have our loved ones. so no worries!
It is beautiful to know that they were always at his side. I am sure that puzzles have a great meaning in your life, it is good to always know a little more about you. How have you been?
I'm really behind answering comments from when the kids were here this weekend. It was a hard time, and maybe the puzzles did help. Thanks for always caring.
I imagine, I have not had Internet today at home. You know here something always happens. I know it was a difficult time for you. But it's good that you've had the puzzles. How has your day been?
I haven't been feeling great today and have slept much of the afternoon away. At least you have internet back now. That is awful that you can't depend on it when you want it.
I hope you feel better soon.💕❤If it's horrible to not have Internet sometimes both for steemit and for the work of the cakes
Did you get any of the heavy rains that they got in Caracas? I saw pictures of streets flooded there. Maybe that had something to do with your internet problem?
Not here it has not rained. As it will rain tonight but sometimes nothing happens and the internet goes away. Today none of the neighbors had internet
as and as I read this post, I felt the emotion intensify ... all this is so beautiful, this story told through puzzles that are made and built as a distraction to the disease, as if to signify to life that we are always there and that we will love it to the end ...
it is wonderful that you did this all together, it is like a great work of which each has placed pieces and that forms a great love for Jim, for each of you, and for life beyond earthly life ....
Your sam post is another wonderful one my dear friend !
What wonderful kind and caring words from you, my dear friend! I got very behind answering comments this weekend while the kids were here from Chicago. It was a really difficult time for all of us and I do feel like we handled it well and did the very best we could. Jim did it well, too.
What a lovely SAM post @melinda010100. I find doing jigsaw puzzles very therapeutic too.
We usually get one out that we can dip in and out of every Christmas.
But we don't do as many since having the grandchildren. 😁
Thanks Gillian. I have a couple new puzzles in the closet that I have been given as gifts. And when it starts to snow and gets really cold outside it will become puzzle weather again.
these are beautiful.. :)
There are some really beautiful jigsaw puzzles! I'm really glad that my neighbor likes to do them also and we both share them back and forth.
Thanks for the sincere post, Melinda! it was very sad to read your words. each of us may encounter something similar in our life and your experience is very valuable
Being at the bedside of someone that I loved as they lay dying was a first-time experience for me. And you're right, at some point in our lives it's very possible that we will have to all go through that. While I wouldn't wish it on anyone, I have come to terms with the fact that it is part of life.
alas, it is
When I started reading I immediately understood what confession you will do. You have to be very strong to talk about it. I have come up hard and afraid in your very sad story. Sorry! After reading the post I read all the comments. I think everyone said what I wanted to say. Thank you!
After reading the story I look at all these beautiful puzzles with other eyes.
Awww, thanks my dear friend. Going through that time caused me to learn more about life. And learn more empathy for all the people who have gone through that same experience with grief. I was looking for a subject for your SAM Challenge, and was drawing a blank, and when I thought of the puzzle photos, the words were actually easier to write than I expected. It will be 2 years in January and he will always be part of something about me.
I understand. We have to go through these events in our lives sooner or later. I think it's a lesson for many of us your story. Thanks for bringing this value to this challenge.
Just hope it was not too somber or depressing. It certainly wasn't my intention to write a depressing post for your wonderful challenge! I love seeing how well the challenge is doing. I think I'm probably as excited as you are about it.
Thank you for your involvement and help. No, your post was not depressing ... it was wonderful. About Love, Acceptance, Life. I learned a lot from your story. It gives us the power and understanding of the meaning of life and existence. Thank you! It told us a lot about you!
Bagus sekali gambar nya saya sangat suka dengan postingan nya.
@melinda10100 I remember that time in your life so well. I was really just getting to know you and understood the need to have his life mean more than the sickness he had.
He had such a rich and full life and I celebrate the fact that you were able to give him the peace and comfort of doing normal, everyday things. To have something else to focus on and share. What a wonderfully caring person you are. I had no idea the depth of you.
I am glad you shared this part of you. I knew, and I am so happy everyone else can see that part of you. It was such an honor to sit quietly with you as you watched over your Jim.
I actually think of that time often, and how sweet and fleeting life is. May God bless you richly.
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Thanks, D. Some days I think I am still recovering from those days, and other days I wonder if I ever will. It certainly changed my life. I appreciate your kind words. And the tip, too.
@melinda10100 In some ways, I think we are not meant to ever fully recover, so it's not to lose some of those very special moments that one can only have it's such an intimate intercourse in life. I could not imagine a spouse, but went through it with my oldest brother and I have to say even though it was long ago, I can remember it like it was yesterday and in some ways it feels just as fresh. Having said that, there has been a balm that has washed over my soul and protects it on a basis. I can see him in gestures from his kids and he remains alive through them. Life will never be the same, and sad as that is, Jim would want you to carry on As You Are or, holding a brave front for all to see. You are an amazing woman and what you went through is the hardest thing you will ever have to go through your life. But you went through it giving him Grace and dignity and for that I absolutely adore you.
Thank you so much for your always kind and thoughtful words.
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