Six Tasks - A Dusty The Demon Hunter tale.
Dusty's 6th story.
After the second story had divulged itself to me, I thought it might be a good idea to theme the stories with numbers. Obviously, it was too late for 'Double Trouble' and perhaps that would have been a little obvious anyway, but Trouble Times Three worked well.
Santa and Doppelganger became the 4th and 5th stories and then Six Tasks arrived in my head - Seven arrived with a nice reference to Viking mythology and I enjoyed writing that. I have an idea for eight and possibly nine, but they're still mulling themselves over in my headspace somewhere.
Neither six nor seven have been shared for free anywhere else, so this and the next are true exclusives for Steemit.com
I enjoyed writing this, the sixth of Dusty's adventures. I hope you enjoy reading it.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Pictures from Google Free to use Image Search, gifs from Giphy.com
Dusty didn’t see the malevolent expression on the Devil’s face and she hefted her sword as she sprang forward.
The demon saw the attack coming and he tried to counterattack with a wave of his arms.
Whatever the reason that the magic or demonspells didn’t work, wasn’t as important as the fact that they didn’t.
The demon was bemused at first until he realised that his right arm was as important in the spell-casting as his left, so he backed off from his daughter and tried waving just his left arm in the hope that he could conjure something to stop her.
Then he realised that he was being prevented from using his spells.
He again glared at the Devil who replied with a nonchalant shrug of the shoulders and hands lifted in the air in a parody of ‘I dunno what happened’.
Dusty’s father didn’t stand a chance in hell.
She lunged forward, swinging the singing blue blade, and lopped off his left arm at the shoulder as she moved forward.
She sprang away from the useless right stump as it tried to reach her as though the hand was still there.
She then spun around and took off his right arm at the shoulder to match the left.
Then she swept low to the ground and took both legs off at the knee and then with another swing, before the body could overbalance back in the opposite direction, the sword sang happily as she took his legs off mid-thigh.
The demon’s body flopped around on the ground like a grotesque landed fish and she went forward to stand above his head.
She placed a boot on his mouth to keep him still and silent while she talked to him.
“Incest? You’re not happy that you took my mother from me, you would also corrupt my very soul to meet your own ends?”
She could feel the head wobbling under her foot.
“I know now that there is something very special about me, because you’ve not given the opportunity to any of your other spawn. I wonder if that is because my mother was a virgin when you seduced her and was still a virgin when I was born.”
Dusty heard the gasp of realisation from the Devil behind her and she understood that she was right.
“Think on this then. I know that I cannot kill you here, in this place, but I can inconvenience you.”
She turned to the Devil and asked, “Do I have your assurance that we will be returned safe and unharmed, with no repercussions from the events of today?”
The Devil nodded. “You have my word. I shall use no trickery with you Dusty, you have behaved impeccably, with honour and respect. You will be returned as though this never happened. I will not remove your memories, there is no need.”
“Thank you.” Then she turned back to the wriggling demon at her feet, removed her foot from his mouth and before he could utter any plea or threat, she removed his head and kicked it far from his body.
“When you find it, I hope you put it back on wrong,” she called loud enough that the ears on the still bouncing head could hear her. Then she took Hunter’s hand and nodded a farewell to the Devil.
He nodded too and there was an opening right in front of them, they could see Hunter’s house, the clear, cold morning and the peace of her world.
They stepped through together and just as the gateway closed, they heard the Devil laughing as though they had amused him more than anything else had ever done.
The pair of half-demons looked at each other. They were both deathly pale and smudged with hell grime but they were safe and they knew that Dusty had made another friend – for as long as it suited him, of course.
They made their way to Hunter’s home. His dad wanted to see the sword.
When they got to the kitchen, Hunter’s mother turned to say hello to Dusty but when she saw the dishevelled state they were in, she was shocked and she couldn’t speak for a moment. Then she found her voice again and the questions just kept coming, without any time between them for Dusty or Hunter to answer.
“What on earth have you been doing? How have you got into such a state? What are all these marks on your hands, Dusty?”
Dusty smiled at the tumultuous barrage of questions and it didn’t even phase her when she saw the scratches on her hands. They must have been defensive wounds from her father as she was attacking him.
“Come over to the sink, we’ll get those scratches cleaned up; they look like they could turn nasty. Oh look at the dust on your clothes; you’re both all dusty... I mean... oh you know what I mean. Come on, shake the dust off outside.”
They both shouted “NO!” at the same time at that instruction and it was only then that Hunter’s mother stopped enough to actually be able to listen.
When they had heard the complete story, had cleaned up Dusty’s wounds and collected the hell dust safely and placed it all in secure vials, Hunter had one last question.
“When the doppelganger appeared, you took no time at all to decide which was the real me. How did you know?” he asked. Dusty could see the concern on his face and she smiled and waited for a moment before she answered him.
“You flinched.”
“So?”
“You knew that I can hurt you easily because I punched you. The doppelganger hadn’t learned and I took advantage of it.”
“So by upsetting you, I actually saved my own life?”
“I can’t guarantee that’ll always be the result of upsetting me though,” Dusty said and she lifted her hand swiftly up and he flinched again.
She laughed at his expression when he realised what she’d done, and then she handed her sword, cleaned of the demon remains, to Osborn, Hunter’s father and she explained where she’d got it and what effect it had had on the demon, her father.
Later, when Hunter had escorted her safely to the back lawn of her home, she saw something glint in the moonlight.
Curious, she went to where she had seen the glint and she smiled at what she found. It was a miniature pitchfork.
The Devil had left her a memento.
I really enjoyed this story from beginning to end. Fascinating, compelling and edge-of-seat suspense and action! Dusty rocks! :D
Thank you! I think she does too!
Greetings, Michelle.
I've followed you for some time but have yet to read your work or comment, so this is a first for both. I have a few things to say, and it should be noted that I'm not saying these things to be inflammatory, but to be constructive.
There's more telling than showing going on. This paragraph in particular caught my eye:
"When they got to the kitchen, Hunter’s mother turned to say hello to Dusty but when she saw the dishevelled state they were in, she was shocked and she couldn’t speak for a moment. Then she found her voice again and the questions just kept coming, without any time between them for Dusty or Hunter to answer."
Was her mouth wide? Were her eyes growing larger? I want to visualize what's going on. I understand there's dialogue after but I'd like to "see" more interaction. Facial expressions, body language, etc.
Also, one more sentence threw me for a loop:
"The demon’s body flopped around on the ground like a grotesque landed fish and she went forward to stand above his head."
I have no idea what image this is trying to convey. I also think the phrasing 'grotesque landed fish' messes with the rhythm of the sentence.
That's just my two cents though! I hope I didn't offend. I'm only trying to help the best way I can. I'm by no means perfect, though. Just calling what I see.
Hope you're having a good night/day! :)
Hey @xanderslee! Thanks for getting around to reading. Especially thank you for taking time to critique my work. You may be surprised to hear that I really DO appreciate it because you've pointed out some things that will improve my writing and I always appreciate that.
You're absolutely correct in the kitchen scene. More could have been done with showing not telling. I have a string of excuses for that - it's a short story, the pace needed to be fast, not time or room for description - but at the end of all those excuses I have to realise that's exactly what they are - excuses, not valid reasons. Thank you for pulling me up there.
The second point, you're entirely right on that too! I wrote it a few years ago and I've improved in my writing since then (I hope) and when I re-release these stories, I'll certainly be addressing those points (and any others you find and point out, I'm sure).
I think the sentence needs the 'standing above his head' part sorting out rather than the imagery of a landed fish flopping about on the riverbank.
That extremely rare occasion when upsetting a woman did a man, in the person of Hunter, some good.
Yeah, but it's the exception that proves the rule, remember ;)
thank goodness .. I am still in..if you read my comment on your last post .. omg .. behave :)
LOL I know... I go too far sometimes... sorry :)
Undoubtedly it was a very interesting chapter that completely captured my attention, I, as well as Dusty was pleasantly surprised at the end of the chapter, when the Devil left her miniature forks, it was unexpected. I am full of this story and every day I'm waiting for the continuation :)
Thank you
Ah... there's no continuation with this adventure... at least not yet.
Dusty has another story to be shared. I may take a break from that for a few days because I have a few other irons in the fire so to speak.
Thanks for your comment.
you definitely should rest, Dusty has legs, and I'm sure in the future we will see a wonderful continuation ... Dusty is the most interesting and charismatic character of your works, me and many others will be interested in contemplating new adventures reading new works :)
Thanks to Stimit, I was able to find you, and I'm done this :)you definitely should rest, Dusty has legs, and I'm sure in the future we will see a wonderful continuation ... Dusty is the most interesting and charismatic character of your works, me and many others will be interested in contemplating new adventures reading new works :)
Thanks to Steemit, I was able to find you, and I'm done this :)
Thank you. :)
Loved the story, the characters flew right out the story at me and I felt like I was walking in the Demon world right next to Dusty.
Well done Michelle on an excellent piece of work.
Thank you! :)
Interesting read as ever. Thanks for sharing.
I read a wonderful story, very engrossed. Continue your writing. Thank you very much for sharing the beautiful story with us.
Story writing very nice..I like this post.. thanks for sharing this post..
Amazing story.A debt of gratitude is in order for sharing it.
♥Upvoted and resteemed♥
Great one @michelle.gent.
Nice story..Keep it up..Upvoted and resteemed.
OMG This post fascinates meeeeeeeeeeee
Words with emotions and I like the picture of Minotaur
And these pictures are really you are cool
Thank you. Well done for spotting the statue!
Your every part i read and this part is very inrestling....Thank you for sharing. Carry on your writing story...Well done....
Great story. Gotta read your article more often. Newbie here :)
I enjoyed this story from start to finish, @michelle.gent! At some point I hope there will be continuations of the Dusty saga...
really enjoyed reading this upvoted and resteemed
Right, finally started to re-read this and am determined not to be distracted until I catch up.