Hi guys, Ive been been debating if to make this post or not and decided that I need to express myself.
My relationship has been on the rocks for some time now and I have been trying as hard as posible to make things work but things have suddenly taken a turn for the worst.
Two days ago my wife told me that our 14 year relationship is finished and that I had to leave, I told her to give me a few days to find a place to live and that @aidancloquell my oldest son and the most important thing in my life preferred to stay with me. This set her off into a frenzy of anger and despair shortly afterwards she went to the police and accused me of abusing her, these claims are false I would never dream of doing the things that she claims I have done. Here in Spain domestic violence laws are quite clear : you go to jail first .... So for the first time in my life I was handcuffed and placed in a small cold cell left to suffer.
I spent last night at a friends house, I can stay here until thursday after that his room mate returns and I will have to seek shelter somewhere else. I have a court order that does not allow me to to come with a kilometer of my home or my wife something absolutely crazy. I have never and would never even consider hurting her regardless of what she has done to me I would forgive her in a second but right now even is she called me I am unable to answer the phone.
She has all our savings, the only thing I have access to is my Steem account and as much as I dont want to I have to powerdown my account as I will be having to pay a lawyer need to find a place to live and Im also expected to pay childsupport. Im scheduled to start working next month part time and in May full time again.
I have asked Aidan to continue his coding and posting, Normally I always helped him with his posts and helped to push him to keep at it everyday. He's a great kid and both him and my daughter are the big victims in this nightmare situation.
I will try and make some interesting posts these days to keep active but right now Im looking for a job to fill the gap until I start my guiding job next month, sorry to have to cry you my river but Steemit has given us so much I feel a little bit better after having written this, but im in the worst state of my life right now. I would not post this on facebook as I prefer to tell my friends and family one by one about what has happened.
Lorenzo
This is place on record your kindness & encouragement towards me, @mallorcaman
Praying & hoping for a full reconciliation & restoration between you & your wife & your whole family.
May your family be made whole once again.
The tree by its fruit.
You have not lost everything, Lorenzo.
I understand that you were speaking metaphorically. It is with keen interest that I follow your son, @aidancloquell around @Steemit.
Aidan is an example to young people about how to prepare themselves for life.
You created the environment for him to grow. I doff my hat to you, sir.
Stay calm, man! This is not easy. But you have whole steemit community with you
Im trying my children are coming today to see me so at least I have something to look forward to
Hey Man sorry to hear this is going on in your life @ the moment
I dont have internet access right now so please understand I will likely not reply to your comments today
By the way, it seems as if @ned is trying to get ahold of you @mallorcaman!
damn man, thats a hard post to publish, hope things get better. Read it all and wonder if you dont have any friends or fam that can lend you a couch or at least some money until you can free up your cash. I hope you have more than steem dollars, and bitcoins and dash, enough to live on that for the next month or so. Also a bit of a tip, try to get on Airbnb and negotiate a long term rate, some remain empty for a long time, and having it full for the whole month for a higher than expected fee, would be great for them and good for you.
Its a dificult time for everybody here financially shortly before the season starts she has our money all I have access to is my steem account which Im powering down now. I can sleep on sofas thats not a problem but i need a place to live so my children can come and stay with me.
I hope things improve for you, I really do. Being falsely accused of abuse must be horrendous. Stay strong for your kids...it's easy to say, I know. A day will come when you're all passed this and things will be good again.
Bro...I am so sorry to hear this. How awful.
Keep your head raised high and stay as strong as humanly possible, if not for yourself, do it for your kids. Sometimes it takes being scraped across the bottom of the barrel to find out who you truly are.
Much love and prayers headed your way!
Thats is a tough one to read - stay strong, all the best for you and family, maybe it will work out again? BePositive
Hang in there buddy. Things can only get better from here. My thoughts are with you.
I have to go to trial if I prove that she is lying she could be the one to go to prison either way its a no win scenario.
I must admit that doesn't sound great. But if you try to focus your attention on any positives that might arise from this situation you will find that in time you will reach a happier place than the one you were at.
Please keep in touch. I would be happy to offer positive words of support from afar.
Keep your head up, this ordeal will make you stronger.
Thanks but I feel anything but strength right now. I hope your right
Sorry to hear that! Best of luck!
Ahh that sucks to hear... hope everything works out for the better in the end.
I've personally had to power down as well, have a few crypto-debts to pay off to a few friends who helped me in a time of need, unfortunately for me those crypto's got pumped quite a lot lately and its making it harder to repay them fully. Its really a shame having to exchange my SteemPower which I have accumulated over the months for the price it is now, but what can you do.
Good luck to you and your situation!
It really sucks to have to sell my Steem off now that I bought at double the price. If I could I would buy more now :(
Sorry to hear of your family troubles, what an aweful situation to be locked out of your own home and threatened with baseless legal threats.
I was extremely sad to read about the events in your family. Having recently suffered a less dramatic break up and still being upset by it. I just wanted to say, although I am sorry you will need to sell some steem, it is great that you had it as a safety net. Best of luck to you man.
Sorry for your loss...
Sorry to hear of this time your going through.
Sorry to hear about this, so sad. I hope things work out, somehow!
Lo siento mucho, @mallorcaman . Sometimes the life it's not easy and it's testing our limits. I hope things get better for you and your son. Abrazos.
Life can deal you some terrible blows. I am gutted to hear this and thought there was something wrong a few days ago when you talked about a low point in your life. Moments like these are so hard to advise except to try had keep your head held high and do what is right for you, your children, your wife, your family and friends. I feel for you. Stephen
Sorry to hear this. Hope everything turns out okay.
Divorce is tough, even when in the best of terms, and its especially hard on the kids. I hope your wife will reconsider what she is doing to the kids with her crazy claims. Good luck my friend.
You out greww her, she realized it, and she tried to rend your guts. Eff that. 14 years of emotional education. You got this. Your kiddo is a savage coder. Thank you for that. He inspires me. You on the other hand have more than she does and that my friend is Dignity. Don't fret, even thoigh the sun sets it will rise again. Stay strong, keep going. Maybe its time for her to learn about 'you don't know what you have until its gone'.
So sorry to here the sad news. My thoughts and best wishes are with you, Aidan and your daughter. Things in life will beat us to our knees, it's just our job to get back up.
Stay strong, and make the best of this difficult situation! Divorce is the hardest thing ever, especially if there are kids involved. The truth will reveal itself and remember...it is not how you fall or how many times you fall...it is the way you stand up, and best of all....KARMA IS A REAL BITCH! Everything that you do to others...will come back to you in some form. You just have to sit and wait...and if you are lucky then God will even let you watch. Stay strong and the whole steemit community is surely praying for you.
Best wishes.
Hey hang in there! sorry to hear that.
Very sorry to hear this. I hope you can come through this stronger than before and prosper. Relationships are a tricky thing. Wishing you all the best
I stayed up late and went back thru your posts to find what you mentioned about all this.
I am so sorry for you man.
Regardless of the situation --- men need to stop being biased against like this, it happens every day, women are NOT the only victims in life.
I wish I could do more to help you my friend.
https://steemit.com/steemit/@barrydutton/our-steemit-brother-here-is-in-bad-shape-very-nice-guy-he-really-needs-our-help
Mucho animo!!
This is happening to many men in Spain
Although Spain has been for long time one of the countries with the lowest violence rate against women
(Data from fra.europa.es)
In Spanish laws if a woman says a man hurt her (phisical or pshicological) ,you go first to jails ,usually loose your job ,and your house , can not see your children... etc
From my experience ,it is quite hard to try to defend as a man against her
From my experience the best tactic is try to protect your children from your ex wife , there are many laws defending kids from parents violence , and kids are many times more sensible to unfairness than adults
Si vienes a Madrid , te puedes quedar unos dias en mi casa si lo necesitas
Un abrazo
Omg...
Wait.. so first they put you in jail, and then they see if you are guilt? Is it legal?
New laws here are quite clear. If i go within 200 meters of my home or even answer a phone call from her I go to prison for a minimum 180 days
This is why I speak so much about male issues. Because if you would had called the police and said she abused you, she wouldn't had been placed in jail like you were. Women need to understand that they can't get away with this stuff, it's wrong!!! I have met wayyy too many guys in this position and it breaks my heart, wish I could do more.
There are many cases of false accusations. My lawyer told me that all this was planned. With these charges I will be unable to have custody of my children.
We refuse to recognize that in the desire to protect women we can actually harm both males and females. A few months ago someone was telling me about how the couple next door was having issues, that they had been yelling the whole day. So the dude that was telling the story, told me that he was looking into their house to see whether he would hit her so that he could call the police on the husband. I asked him if instead he had seen the woman hurt the man, whether he would had called the police too. He said he never thought about it, and that he doesn't think he would.
I never saw my father lay one finger on my mother, but she would jump him in public with total impunity.
We are all wise after the event my friend! Time for you to be the Boss now!!
P.S. Follow Popp's youtube vids - he's been EXACTLY where you are right now!!