Here's the second part of the story about the Buddhist monk named Horatio whom I met when I was traveling in Japan at age 22:
Stardate: July 1992
Whenever I visit a Buddhist temple I am reminded of that fascinating but rather vulgar character, Horatio Aleggartero, or in his Chinese name, The Venerable Weh'T.
We have so far spent many days together, and I'm now reflecting upon what he told me last night. Before I recount the story, I need to tell you about his physical attributes.
Horatio is a rather fat man, middle-aged and in possession of a very lively and intense personality. His head and eyebrows are shaved bare. He looks rather strange with his eyebrows shaved, so that only a black stubble is visible. His head has a glow to it. I thought his head was either waxed or oiled because it is so shiny at all times.
The most upsetting part of his features are his eyes and his shaved eyebrows.
His upper and lower lashlines have a faint bluish-purplish hue to them, which makes his already bulging eyes look even larger, more alive and wriggling, like a colored lizard. This coloring over-enhances his eyes to the point that I am reminded of a circus clown, not a Buddhist monk.
So this brings me to telling you about last night at the bar with Horatio. He asked if I wanted to go with him to a bar in town. I had nothing else to do so I accepted.
The bar was quite dark, and I distinctly remember the first thing Horatio did after we sat down was turn over his Buddhist temple emblem, which was attached to his monk satchel. He turned the emblem so that the temple logo faced away from him.
I found this rather odd so I asked him why he did this. He said that he had to turn it over because he was going to be acting more like a man, less like a monk. He said the things he was going to tell me were at odds with his religion and he had to do that in order to clear his conscience.
I thought it was weird.
However, I was interested in what he was going to tell me. He reminded me of the fact that I love to learn about the unknown. He figured out that part of me during those psychological tests. He was very right about me liking, uh, loving the unknown.
He then proceeded to tell me about one of the largest Buddhist monasteries in Japan. He first asked me if I knew anything about them. I told him I didn't. Then he went on to tell me about how the monks and nuns act during a celebration.
He told me that during some celebrations, the monks and nuns have a huge party together in the monastery.
They have every kind of drink imaginable: wine, sake, cognac, vodka, beer, basically every kind of alcoholic beverage that exists. They also have food, again, every kind of food imaginable. They spend the entire night feasting and drinking into the wee hours of the morning. During the party, he said that many people go off and have sex with various people. He then went on to describe how a sex orgy at this party would be a common occurrence. He seemed to relish telling me about all the details of these sex orgies. His pupils became enlarged and his face became even more lively than before.
While he was describing the orgy, I could tell he was fishing for my responses. He obviously was getting off while he explained the sordid details about the monks and nuns having an orgy in a Buddhist monastery.
I found this kind of gross, due to his shaved eyebrows and bald head, which I found utterly repulsive. His eyes, those beady eyes, they were certainly nothing I wanted more of.
After having this experience with Horatio, I came to realize that just because one is a monk, it doesn't really mean anything.
Monks are just people with flaws. Sure, there are probably some great monks who don't try to seduce 22 year-olds, but I would bet there are actually few who aren't able to ignore that wriggling bit beneath their belt.
Nothing happened with Horatio and myself, as far as sex stuff. I found him physically repulsive to an extreme degree. I would guess that if he had been attractive (and Japanese), I might have entertained the idea. I noticed that once I was in Japan, I was beginning to be attracted to Japanese men more than foreign ones. This was mainly due to the novelty factor and also because I didn't really have any experience with them, so they occupied a certain fantasy element in my mind.
I would bet that Horatio was attempting to seduce me, however, I wasn't interested in him that way. During my stay in that Japanese city, my options for companionship were rather limited, and Horatio was the most mentally stimulating out of all my options. But that was it. I am not sure what was in his mind, but I would bet he simply wanted to fuck me. That's why he kept bringing up orgies, attractive girls and all the rest. What a joke.
After that experience with Horatio in the bar, him turning his Buddhist emblem upside down, I had enough of him. That was the last I saw of him and his shaved eyebrows. Meeting him reminded me that most religious people are not to be trusted. They have selfish desires, just like the rest of us. All during college I had read about Buddhist monks in my Eastern Religion classes, and I had always assumed that monks were vastly different from regular people. I was wrong. I would bet that perhaps 1% of monks are like the ones I read about in college, and 99% of them are like Horatio: fat, lewd, and trying to seduce girls half their age.
Meeting a half-assed Buddhist monk was perhaps the best education I could have ever received.
I might add that I have been an atheist since I was 8 years old. I studied Buddhism, Taoism and Hinduism during college. Out of all the possible religions, I do think that Buddhism and other Eastern religions are the most useful to humanity. I do a form of thinking that I created myself, but I don't consider myself Buddhist or any other religion. I guess most people would call what I do meditation, but to me, it's just thinking. That's how most of my actions/plans in life get formulated and visualized. Once these ideas come to me during this thinking time, I made a pact with myself to do them. I don't pay attention to any external factors that get in the way. I simply do what ideas come to me during this thinking time. It makes life simple.
Here is part 1 of this story: https://steemit.com/journal/@stellabelle/i-met-a-buddhist-monk-when-i-was-22-this-is-what-he-said-to-me-journal-found-tonight
It's interesting what you say in the last paragraph about your thinking and meditation. I've been reading Jung's Psychological Types, and in the first chapter he talks about how the common attitude in the age of antiquity towards what we now understand as "thoughts" or "internal monologue" was that they were more visionary or some sort of magic like perhaps the gods speaking through or to you.
I think 'gods' were invented because the average person cannot comprehend where these highly imaginative ideas come from, as we cannot just accept the fact that they might emerge organically, just as cells form, birds sing, etc. I feel that humans are not comfortable with the unknown, and in their quest to get rid of anxiety, they must define everything. I take the opposite view: I am comfortable with the unknown, and I don't have the need to define everything. This is a more organic approach to living and to understand what the contents are inside one's own mind. I've spent a good chunk of my life studying these mind things in depth, and by doing, I am not afraid of them, nor do I need to define their origins.
But yes, I have had many 'visions', too, as many religious people would define them. I see no reason to define my visions as something religious though. The visions appeared to me, as a way of directing my energies in life towards them. They had a purpose. I am not special in this arena. Many people live this way.
Yeah, and that's clear in the characterizations of human nature in Greek and other mythologies,with different gods likely reflecting conflicting urges and beliefs of people.
I think vision-esque experiences are the product our intuition and subconscious processing experiences and information, and spitting out conclusions very suddenly into our conscious minds. You're right, many people do live that way, myself included; based on our society and what it values, it's decidedly a less common way of being, but an important and valid one nonetheless.
i believe people like us would fit in very easily in a tribe. A lot of modern society people have lost their inner narrative, as it has been replaced by consumerism. The traveling inward has a wealth that people of nowadays have mostly lost. Artists, programmers, writers and other creative people, those who create not in some kind of mechanical way, but as a product of inner dialogue, those people are like the messengers of a world before corporations and the over-dependence on consumerism. The less I buy, the more I am creating to fill in the voids. It took me a while, but I can say that I don't really desire things anymore. I desire experiences and connection, but not 'things.' It has not always been this way, but I started my quest pretty early....in my early 20's. I've been practicing this for a while now.
Huh, that's a really thought provoking perspective. Maybe Steemit is the tribe! I'm definitely getting better at detaching myself from things. Objects only matter to me insofar as they are vehicles for experience.
Do you think your water visions of a machine and ocean were steem premonitions? Maybe foreshadowing your children's book?
@stellabelle - Your story amazes me but at some level I think I have seen half ass monks of many many religions in my travels. I have seen people considering themselves greatest servants of God act with a 'holier than thou' attitude towards needy fellow humans practically in every temple, mosque or church I visited. This was to such an extent that I almost vowed to never visit such places of worship. I would not call myself an atheist - I do believe that there is a point of strength every man or woman needs to believe in. Perhaps this is God for some and perhaps it is some loved one for some others - that is immaterial but I believe that at some moments in life, we have to look for this external source of strength. Unfortunately, the path to this external source of strength is riddled with middlemen created by our society and religious structure. As an intellectual at some level, I can meditate (think actually as you point out) and connect to my strength sources in my mind but multitudes have been coached, for centuries, that they need these middlemen like Sadhus, Moulas, Priests and Monks to reach God. Religion, in many senses, has become a source of creating money and power in many countries. I speak about this often with people and try to educate them. I do not know how much effect it has but I will keep trying. Sorry for this rant but your blog triggered this chain of thought. It is admirable that you tried to share your experience and have chosen your own path of religion and meditation (thinking). Thanks for sharing.
Hello @stellabelle. I translated this post in Russian. Translation here: https://steemit.com/journal/@igor-steem/ya-vstretila-buddiiskogo-monakha-kogda-mne-bylo-22-goda-i-vot-chto-ya-uznala-zhurnal-naiden-segodnya-vecherom. Thank you! Post is very interesting. The last paragraph for me was the most important in this series of articles. Very interesting rule of life. Respect!
Ooh that physical description! So descriptive that I felt like I was sitting at the bar with him listening to that story.
What an interesting -- big picture -- life experience. Travel is so enriching. Thanks for sharing this story!
thanks for reading.
inspiring! "I just call it thinking." That moved something in me, gave me motivation. thanks.
maybe it's because as humans we have to overcomplicate everything. Maybe we are better off thinking in very general terms instead of fucking up everything with over-complexity.
Bummer that Horatio had to make a move...this kind of disappointing story was so familiar to me in my 20s when everything with men inevitably seemed to come down to sex.
I really like your "thinking" ritual and how you simply honor without doubt what arises for you in that space, it's brilliant!
The Broken Buddha, A Critcal Review of Theravada Buddhism and A Plea For A New Buddhism
I had an opposite experience. But I went looking for a Buddhist Teacher and found a Korean center in Gresham Oregon. Mahayana Korean Zen has its own problems, which my teacher a Korean Monk, we were both in our 30s at the time, he told me about lots of corruption and broken vows.
My teacher treated me as if I was a Buddha, he became my first real male friend. He never did or said anything inappropriate and taught me true compassion. Even if you are broken and wild like me there is the potential within you to become free, to become a Buddha. Sunim helped me break free from trauma conditioning brought on by childhood sexual abuse by my stepfather. I owe him and the Korean community my life, they helped me save myself and my family.
Buddhism is not about gods or deities, its not about earning merits, it's about the letting go of aversion, craving, and ignorance regarding who you truly are and seeing reality as it is not as you wish it to be...
Men abused me but I don't hate all men, my Mom abandoned me, but I don't distrust all women, however I am also very careful, I don't trust anyone until I've known them personally for a couple years.
I'm sorry you had a bad experience @stellebelle, but not everyone has had a bad experience with Buddhist Monks
Is that Den of Earth?
@stellabelle And that is why I came back to catch up on your blog. Very entertaining to me. I actually laughed out loud a couple times while reading this. No eyebrows reminded me of when Neo got flushed out of the Matrix. LOL
Also I like the fact that you say you learned a lot from this half-assed monk. Hahahah Also one thing that struck me as very interesting was that you have been atheist since you were 8 years old. I have a very similar experience. I called bullshit on Noah's Ark when I was 7. It logically didn't make sense even then.
Reading your story give me reason to keep faith in humanity and not doing something stupid.
As you already said, you are flawed, … But who isn’t ? I am, they are, even a monk is not perfect - even if he tends to be :)
There is hope.
That's so great that you have studied about buddhism and hinduism . As I am from India we belong to hindu family but we also pledge buddism.
We have seen "JAIN's" a caste in buddhist that they work for people and help at its best.
I learn alot from them.
If you have seen shaved buddhist then you should also know about when they pledge for buddhism They have to leave their family and to also have to give their clothes off with their flip flops too.
Thank you @stellabelle for sharing your experience with us.
And I wanna welcome your mother for becoming a part of our family.
@stellabelle <3
thanks
I am late here. I am a spiritual person practicing meditation from 5 years. I like buddism.
I have made a funny post about you just check it.
https://steemit.com/funny/@krishatnet/celebrities-about-stellabelle-funny-memes-just-for-fun-only
I liked part 1 and I'm sure I will enjoy this part also
gonna read it and resteem it right now because you are always awesome
Stella i learn a lot of things from your posts. Thanks for sharing
I've spent 10 days with some Tibetan monks fasting, and also later in life I did some interviews with some Tibetan monks for a documentary looking into their views on certain ancient scriptures. There are three things going on.... 1) Some can't handle life and run to monkhood. 2) Some seek divinity and dive into the religion, not questioning, and doing "good" within the exoteric religious doctrine. 3) Really wise masters or lamas who have been deep into the inner worlds and esoteric paths of their traditions. It all depends on which of these we spend time with. Peace, ww.
Upvoted and resteemed after reading
I like your way of telling stories @stellabelle
thank you.
you are welcome
@stellabelle Thanks for This Wonderful Post . I was Waiting for this one. What a Spiritual Experience You Had very deep post. Great Memoir for You I can understand , Hope I would have had one such Experience of Lifetime. Amazing Work , Thanks for Sharing. This is gonna be my Favourite . Upvoted God Bless You. :)
Well written stella.
such a life of a Buddhist requires a lot of dedication. respect to them
Very nice story to read and learn from it. It's true one person didn't present the entire religion. Some people's use religions for their own benefit. It's sad to see something like that.
it happens every day. Just look at the Catholic priests and what they did to children.
I just read a news on CNN about Catholic priest having a gay party in their top priest apartment . Here a link for you to read. https://www.google.com/amp/www.nydailynews.com/amp/news/world/vatican-police-raid-drug-fueled-gay-orgy-cardinal-apartment-article-1.3302974
Oh my. I've read it all. Now i definitely need a drink. Buddhist Monk orgy is a hard pill to swallow lol.
I thought monks are like all into wisdom and true meaning of life...
That first picture though.. haha.
Actually i enjoyed it a lot. So there was another part? I'll probably go check it out!
and did you get a drink?
I'm driving people to drink?
Yep i made a cup of green tea. And now i feel better!
But i'll remember that about half-assed Buddhist monk. So one day i can say that i've seen it all! Even though it won't be true.
Omy goodness that's so funny hahaha.
is your avatar a blue mr. bean?
Yyyeees? I hope you're not offended with my avatar. It's the first picture i found in google.
not offended at all...i love mr. bean.
yes here it is: https://steemit.com/journal/@stellabelle/i-met-a-buddhist-monk-when-i-was-22-this-is-what-he-said-to-me-journal-found-tonight
Thanks :d
Sigh, religions can be beautiful, the religious? not so much. I am an agnostic, leaning hard towards atheism. I find most religions rather frightening, they all value the scrotum brigade above all else. Thanks for the post, it was very enjoyable.
what is the 'scrotum brigade'?
Weird to hear how he had that uncanny tinge around his eyes but at least it probably doesn't bother him.
I agree with many principles of Buddhism and with them the world would definitely be a better more peaceful place.
It is one of the most rational, harmonious, just humane religion there is.
We should all live with Metta. (Loving Kindness)
kindness except when people are trying to abuse or manipulate us for thier own gain. Then we fight like hell.
Interesting story. I have found the Buddhist philosophy very useful in my personal life, but have not yet met a monk like that thankfully. I try to vet my teachers rather carefully anymore. Sad but there is so much garbage to sift through in one's Spiritual journey and Personal Growth adventures. Thanks for the share!
Sometimes people are not how they look in there appearance but this at least gave you an alert sign that even people who tend to show that they have a pure heart are not always the same.
In a similar vein, I attended yoga classes for months, only to learn that both the long-time practitioners and teachers were no more spiritual than a non-spiritual myself :-)
OMG nice post be happy
Hey @stellabelle.. Thanks for the post. It was as interesting as it's previous part. ☺️☺️✌️👍✍️
meditating is the key! nothing more or less that i can do to make myself clam and relax. the more i relax, the better for me to understand thing around me. this is just me, how about you?
Interesting post. I still think that most Buddhist monks have inner pace and whit that, peace of their mind. Dalai Lama for me is extraordinary person. There so many positive thinks you can learn from them. But your experience whit that horny man was kind of strange, bad and weird.
Why do/did you think buddhist monks and sex don't go together?
Afaik even the "real" Buddha advised his young followers do have sex if they can't bear it.
And he certainly hold it that aiming for perfection is the path to disappointment.
Also Buddhism teaches to avoid extremes, and that includes self-desroying ascetic.
I suppose I had the wrong idea from college courses, or my own wrong assumptions. I think I read about acetics, and assumed that monks try to abstain from sex. I would guess some do, but I suppose it depends on the specific monastery.
Yes, there are a lot of different rule sets in every religion. And the Buddhist are, on average, not the strictest I think.
Hi @stellabelle would it be OK if I translated your posts into Afrikaans? It is very similar to Dutch, and even closer to Flemish which they speak in Belgian. Can I then post them under my own account with references and links to you?
Thanks for sharing your experiences with us.
This is very interesting - must have been quite an adventure
haven't read it, have you..
Great storry, really enjoyed a storry while was chillin after work and drinking some tea! Will wait for a new part! resteemed
Now I clearly see why you told me Horatio is not only intelligent but also a disgusting man. I kind of always believed that monks were more a higher degree of being a good person. But like you I do realize that even dark people can hide behind a cloak of light and goodness, but in reality they are still the same person no matter what they try to hide behind. It was probably a good idea that you never saw him again after the bar incident, who knows what else he may have tried to do. You seem very intelligent yourself and mentally strong. No doubt these past situations in life help mold us to be better and stronger today.
What an interesting story and it sounds like you have had some great traveling experiences. I myself have not met a Buddhist Monk, but this gives me some great insight into that culture in general! Thanks for all of your amazing posts and for sharing your talents. Thank you as well for #gettingmyassonsteemit! I am meeting some great friends and learning many great things!
I do Respect Lord Buddha & its teaching.
Maybe what you call thinking is simply stillness.
Was totally not expecting this as how it went down with the monk.
I thought youd get some kind of spiritual epiphany, bc of the interaction...
Hmm...
On a subconscious level, i knew that not all monks in eastern religions were "saintly", but i never thought of it in total awareness. I really wanted some kind of group to be all holy and pure...
Looking back, when i see a monk, i subconsciously feel safe and like i can trust them and tell them my deepest secrets and desires, and that they have all the answers (Yes i totally see how silly that is lol)
This is reminding me of what my message is, which is to listen to your own voice (aka truth).
Because you never know what wolf in sheeps clothing youll be getting life advice from...
I believe we, (individually), have all the answers for our own selves and lives.
We keep ourselves so damn small when we continually give our power away.
Whether it be to a god, gov't, teacher, parents, etc...
Im really loving this platform.
Its very thought provoking and invites loads of similar minded folk.
you've lived a vivid life so far, you'll be a hit at the retirement home when the time comes ;). i had no idea back when we met at the ec house of the variety of your experiences. i wish we could have had more time getting to know each other better
Very interesting read, both posts together. I have often questioned the legitimacy of most religious leaders beyond the scope of moral guides for those who seem to need to be told what is right and wrong in order to function. But we see so many times in the news how much those moral guides seem to lack in the morals department. More of a do what I say, not as I do kinda thing. Your experience really backs that up.
I truly believe we, humanity as a whole, is missing a huge part of our real past. Our history goes back much further than we are taught and until we can recover that knowledge we will always be searching for an explanation for life. Internal reflection on the bigger picture (your deep thinking) is the best way to find our place in all this madness.
It's nice that you kept your journals from your travels as a youth. I never wrote things down like that, I was more of a take pictures person. Unfortunately old school film photos fade faster than pen and paper.
Thank you for sharing @stellabelle.
Remarkable post! Thanks for sharing. WE connected on Twitter recently-I appreciate the tips. Upvoted and now following!
wow great article thanks for sharing your experience with us
@stellabelle
Thank you for sharing your experience. I was already thinking when reading part one and the pointing to the sexual questions: where does this lead?!....
I have some buddhists experiences and I never heard anything about orgies in temples. May there be or not. It is even equal - because it is not my karma. But I tought the doctrine is even contrary - that they avoid the sexual drive just like not eating meat. But actually I dont know it very sure for buddhists pracitcing.
With hindu brahmani it is like described (no sex without the intentions of conceiving a child, no eating meat/fish/eggs, no gambling and further more). So if one comes with sexual ambitions - you know, he is just another human regligious who is preaching water and drinking wine....
Looking forward to read more about your travel experiences :)
ha ha! Yeah, preaching water, drinking wine.
Which interesting publication, I recently caught my attention very much the history or stories about Buddhism, and I am very fascinated and interested in knowing more of this religion
Hello @stellabelle,
Quite the adventure!
I just wanted to say thank you for all the work you did to promote the Dash community with the women of Dash and working with Amanda B Johnson.
Best,
Isaac
I always love to see your posts. In fact, i wait to see your posts desperately. thanks
It is a good introspective position,
To interpreted of the statutes proposed by different religions.
Religion uses sophistry to catch naive and little studious
Within the walls of each type of temple (also of their hearts) other things happen. All earthly, at least 90%.
Hypocrisy and selfishness with outsiders.
The universe has just laws.
I greet your good subject.