I purposely skipped a goal yesterday. Shortly before the finish line. I was aiming at my first monthly author badge and skipped yesterdays posting. That made me lose this badge. I woke up this morning with a moment of feeling regret. I was close, a few posts left and I would have had it.
And here is the thinking error. I posted 24 days straight, skipped one and continue today. Just because it is a counting mechanism makes me not receive the badge as a monthly author. But you know what?
It is fine, it is ok!
Waking up regretting that I skipped a day made me realize that my Ego is tricking me. It downplayed 24 days of posting. One single day shall ruin 24 days? Not with me I thought. I am proud to have reached 24 days of continuous posting. Just to be able to take a look at the HiveBuzz badge which is an awesome project, don't get me wrong is a demand of my EGO but not necessarily of my self.
Sure it would be nice to look at this little cute bee telling others, or rather myself, that I did a good job. But I did a good job already, it is just a picture on a screen to pet my Ego. It doesn't tell anything about me other that I have posted every single day of a month.
It shows something about your will some might say. Does it?
Sure I could have thrown out a random post yesterday to stay on track. But that's another thinking error. This badge shows that you posted every single day of one consecutive month, but it does not show the quality of your post! To receive the badge I could have made a heartless, thoughtless post to just have thrown something out.
End of story, morning glory. Maybe that would have been a smart thing but I did not do it yesterday. ON PURPOSE! I just didn't feel like writing or posting yesterday. I just didn't and that is ok. Who is pressuring me here? Just myself...wait it is not even my self...it is my EGO putting the pressure on me.
It tells me you are just good enough and competitive if you post every day to own a certain badge. You know what?
Screw you EGO!
I feel liberated for not receiving this badge this month because I pushed my Ego back yesterday. I allowed myself and my self to skip a day. To follow my feeling, to enjoy yesterday without going online. And today I'm still alive and doing well. I can write about it, I can let you know that it's ok to not post everyday just for the sake of posting. I can tell you that certain things seem to make us happy when they only for a moment make our Egos happy.
Do you think I would have felt great the rest of my time when pushing through the days and receiving the badge? I can tell you that I would have been proud in a way and happy for a moment. It would have said "MONTHLY AUTHOR". But I can tell you this feeling would have vanished rather quickly. It would have moved for the feeling of now I have to do it again to receive another one because the little number tells I just did it once.
Pressure on Baby! It would have not been enough to just receive the badge. Just with the Weekly author badge my Ego would have been longing for more...for the little number to rise, to add up, to reach the next and the next.
That is not me anymore, it is my Ego taking over and while pushing ourselves to reach certain goals is fine, receiving the badge would not change anything besides polishing my Ego for a moment.
Hive is a place where I can discover myself, my self and a lot of other things. People, topics, projects, crypto, social media you name it. Hive shall not become a super competitive thing for me. If I don't feel like posting one day it should be totally fine. And it is!
It should be for everyone!
We are not going to die when we don't post one day. The only thing that is dying is our Ego. By allowing ourselves to be "weak" we show strength. We show that we understood the difference of doing something because it needs to be done for a legit purpose or of doing something because we want our Ego to be satisfied. But an Ego can not be satisfied ever.
An Ego is always longing for more once it reached something. It is like a drug dealer. You started and once you lose control you want more and more and more. The Ego wants more and more and more, higher, faster, better. That's the nature of it and in certain situations it is fine.
But to be honest, Ego is ruling the world isn't it?
The biggest accomplishment we can achieve for ourselves these days is to overcome our own Egos. Just for once. Once we achieved that other things are put in perspective. We realize that not everything our Ego tells us is right. By overcoming our own Ego for one moment we realize that we still keep existing. I did not vanish because I let my Ego down yesterday. I'm still here and feel even more liberated in a way by not receiving the badge I aimed for.
I feel good because I detached from an urge to receive a badge.
A badge which only purpose would have been to brag about posting 31 days straight. Just to wake up to it wanting more because of the little number next to it.
I'm not judging those who receive that badge, and one day I might too. But then it will be because I felt like posting every day and not because I felt like just posting to receive a badge. I will receive it one day not because of my Ego but because it just happens.
I get it if someone might raise the question why I'm posting here anyways, isn't it all Ego driven? Maybe, in the end I wanna reach someone and yes, I do want to "earn" coins.
But it is a less Ego driven thing than to receive something just to have it. With my posts I wanna make people smile, read, think, discuss, even one day reach out to me for advise or help or maybe to offer a job or just to make friends in a way. I want to bring myself to think about me and certain things and if it wouldn't have been for this badge I might have not gotten to the point of realizing this time my Ego was driving me and I felt bad because my Ego was not satisfied. I overcame it and sure enough I did not feel bad anymore, but proud.
While not achieving the badge, I achieved even more.
I overcame my Ego!
Little by little I will become more aware of it and whenever I get the chance I will work on overcoming my Ego when necessary. I'm sure I will feel better whenever I do.
Have you overcome your Ego for once?
¡¡Slacker!!
You had me at the cover image.. sucked me in. Then I read about weekly and monthly author badges and I'm so confused now. Since I don't know wtf that stuff means, I'm referring back to the cover image.
Who snapped that? How many snaps were required? Heads up: should all of us find ourselves together somewhere and we're out bar hopping or something, getting kicked out of course cuz you're German, we're American, you know.... shit we can't help. When I say 'Pose' it means do whatever you did for that cover and I'll play photographer that way they have a reason to kick us out.
This concludes your midweek ramble
Thanks for honoring my written word 😉...to your questions: A friend of mine, one snap...bar hopping somewhere with some people from da Hive...sounds good, will it ever happen? Maybe 😁
My pleasure
I agree with you on Hive and discovering all sorts of cool things and people - so much more interesting than FB or Twitter...plus you'll get to learn all about the Holmen Mothman soon...
Who likes egos anyway? I work with a bunch of egomaniacs (alphas, to top it) and the most entertaining thing I enjoy doing in meetings with them is calling them out for their BS, in the most humble Irish/Norweigian "innocent" way I can. Oh wait...does that mean I have an ego too? Actually, that's not a good thing - good thing I'm being forced to attend Dale Carnegie training this morning?
Well we all have Egos but it's just a matter of controlling them in a way. Just Ego makes the world a bad place, though a little bit of Ego is necessary.
Most of the so called Alphas are Ego driven to a point that makes me feel pity for them, it is just that we live in a world where this kind of Ego is rewarded and many thrive to reach it as well. In their world I'm a poor individual and yah I am poor, money wise. It's a fact, I admit it...I AM POOR lol.
It might change when I spread the richness of being me 😂 .
What is Dale Carnegie training?
Well, it's an interesting mgt group training thing-y, where it's basically high school speech class with self improvement. I guess Charles Manson was a big fan of it, so....yeah, it's legit??
Yeah money sucks, doesn't it? I tell myself all the time, I don't need it....but I'm not going to lie, if I could be independently wealthy and not have to work any more, life would be so much grander. That's just a grass is greener approach though, I think. I think it is, anyway, right?
We all need it to live and yah the grass is always greener on the other side. We all could live better if it wasn't for the greed of a few.
This is so important! Aside from being kind to yourself and not letting your ego make you think less of yourself, I think it's also important to address this 'hustle culture' that seems so prevalent in the modern world. You're made to feel bad for not being productive, but it's also equally important to rest and heal to avoid being burnt out. Like you said 24 days of writing daily is a huge achievement and shouldn't be diluted by the fact that you missed one day. I also resonate with what you said about weakness as a form of strength. It's perfectly acceptable to be wherever you are in your journey and that's Ok! This post helps me think more kindly towards myself as well. Thanks for this reflection,
Hey thanks, your words really mean something and I thank you for sharing them.
You are right we live in a world where nothing more counts than being productive. The more, faster, better mentality. But this world is changing. Slowly or rapidly I'm not sure, but I see people waking up questioning the Status Quo. I may die in poverty and struggling but to have made you think a little better about yourself by reading my words is worth my own suffer already. Because I maybe planted a little seed, and now it's up to you and anyone else to grow it.
I'm growing my own seeds and who knows...I might own a "forest" one day.
Thanks for swinging by 😊
I remember struggling with that badge last year. For me, I used it as an excuse to force myself into a little more walking and daily Actifit posting to go along with my other posting. The Actifit app gave me a few issues, and didn't just sync well with my watch tracking so I ended up giving that up. I kept feeling a little down not meeting my goals, then I found that when I used my watch for tracking vs. just my phone, I had double, and often triple or more steps than when using the phone itself for tracking. I quickly started relying on the Samsung Health stats instead of Actifit or Google Ifit. My OCD doesn't handle the inaccuracy of just the phone well.. Or maybe I just want to claim more steps, either way, much happier with the watch that tracks sleep and other things as well. Start again! I'm sure you'll get that badge soon. It was easier for me the 2nd or 3rd time trying.
Lol, no one can say I'm not on track with your step tracking now 😄 . I don't even wanna try to get that badge, it will happen eventually and then without forcing it. The trying set me under pressure, a pressure that is unnecessary. My status within Hive should not be measured on my badges but hopefully on my personality. If that moves me forward I am more than happy and I'm sure the @hivebuzz team will understand that it is not against the badge itself. I will smile once I get the notification but I will know that it was not just the Ego wanting it. 😊
How is it going with you and the house? I hope you are happy in anticipation of the new adventure, even though it will be a little stressful moving and stuff. Big hugs and greetings to your other half 🤗 .
Kudos to you for either conquering the ego, or letting it go. Whichever works! I couldn't let it go.. so I guess didn't master my Ego on that one. Was fun, but I didn't go after it again. I'm more a once or twice a week kinda posting... maybe I'll pick up once the job wears in a bit. House all cleaned, prepped and photos last week. Supposed to be listed next week. Found a few potentials back east, dropped one that had contract on cause they were being shit. Re-focused on one we thought was gone...
Lol I wouldn't go so far claiming I have conquered my Ego, I let it go on the badge issue.
I'm not sure about anything regarding myself. A little lost fish in the sea kinda 😄 . But maybe I just feel this way because of the full moon, family issues and my brain running circles 😂. I will get it under control eventually until then it runs like a washing machine.
I like how mindful you have chosen to be over this situation with the monthly badge. I think it's important to check in with ourselves from time to time. And yes, when it comes down to it, quality over quantity wins every time. It's funny how we are suckered into things with rewards systems. Even advertising works on this theory.
Lovely post and I admire your ability to delve into your thoughts and feelings. 💚🤗
Thanks Nathalie 😊, it is nice to have this place. It helps me a lot as I usually just kept things to myself. Not too long ago I would have beaten myself up for not reaching my goal, but to realize that this was nothing bad, because it is just an Ego driven wish, was revealing and deliberating in a way.
This is a Viking saying that means one should seek not to push hard towards a thing to impress others but rather do it because it makes sense to and benefits the individual.
It seemed appropriate on your post.
Skol.
🍻 😁
Way to (e)go! 😁
We made our badges for the FUN, not to enslave people. And your lovely smile and gesture on your picture say it all.
That being said, no rewards for the lazy! So be prepared for next month and get that monthly author badge, whether you care about your ego or not! 😜
😄 I will, eventually. One day this badge will be mine, it will just happen. Thanks for being such great sports!
I was never one to be big on rewards for reaching goals. Especially when someone other than me is providing or dictating that reward. If I set a goal, and reach that goal, I reward myself in a way I see fit. Usually just a self pat on the back or crack of a new beer. lol. I have been ignoring those badges, because they annoy me. My reasoning is not that I can't perform that way, but rather I don't like someone else dictating the rules.. hehe.
😁
We'll it's not the badge you were looking for, but...
Awwwww...I'm blushing 😊
Funny, I got so close to the monthly badge so many time only to miss a day just like you. It was when I stopped caring that several months went and it happened unintentionally.
@NaturalMedicine supports wellness of body, mind, soul and earth on HIVE.
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