Smallsteps had her spring dance performance last night and it was nice to dee her excited and taking it seriously. She really enjoys dancing and music in general (she is tapping piano keys at the moment), but we haven't supported her nearly enough in this, though she is only six. Though, six might be "too late" if she really wanted a career in music or dance perhaps, as it seems that these days, they start with professional coaching at three years of age and are competing by five.
Who wants to be a professional anyway?
From my perspective, I just want her to have some skills she can have some fun with and I know that music and dance can be used socially and tend to have a lot of groups through life for it. Sports however, unless going pro, tends to end around fifteen years of age, with perhaps a renaissance later in life.
I wish I could sing.
The only person I sing aloud for is Smallsteps.
Hopefully, Smallsteps learns and enjoys some Karaoke.
She was a fox in her show.
When she was a kid, I taught her to say "Rock n Roll!" with the hand signs. At preschool, she learned the "fox of silence", which her teacher uses when she wants the class to be quiet. Smallsteps put these two things together and screams.
Focken Fox!
I love it.
It is the best when she does it on the streets. I was hoping for her to do it as they closed out the performance last night, but she didn't unfortunately. That would have made for a great video.
Whilst having breakfast together this morning, Smallsteps said what she thinks we are each good at and my wife got "cleaning" and I got "working" - which I think tells something about what she sees at home, though might not be completely representative of what actually happens. Though, it isn't not not representative either.
Smallsteps is good at many things, but I feel that in this respect, she is like me, a bit of a generalist, with no core skill to fallback upon. She picks things up easily, but she doesn't dedicate herself to be very good at anything. I am not sure if it is a problem in later life, but at least for now, it isn't a bad thing to experiment a bit, however there is a risk.
Picking things up easily but not taking it to a very high level means never really understanding the difficulty of learning something well. The early curve means learning comes very quickly in a short time, but being very good at something means pushing through long periods of little, but important gain. I feel that if I had learned this younger, I would have had a narrower set of skills, but have more willpower and specialized opportunity to push through. Be an expert, instead of a jack of all trades. I have made it work for me to some level, but I do think that it would have been easier and there would have been greater value if I had narrowed my scope a bit. I have flexibility and can offer low level value to many areas professionally, but can't completely "own a role" because I am never the best at any part of it.
We don't know what the future holds, so I do think there is value in Smallsteps having some width to her skillset, but I also believe that being very good at a couple things brings experience value, where a person can "be a fan" of a topic and keep developing for a lifetime. I have never really been a fan of anything, never been that interested in a single topic.
Am I missing out?
Most likely.
We are all missing out, all of the time. Every path we take will mean excluding an infinite amount of alternative paths and we have to come to terms with it. We can't have everything, we can't be good at everything and if we concentrate on one area, we can't concentrate on others. We might want to be a renaissance person who has multiple diverse skills at a high level, but the fact is, most of us are not that talented, not that smart, not that capable.
Sad, but true.
Regardless of what we do for Smallsteps, she is going to have a number of grievances with the way she was raised, where perhaps I worked too much in her opinion, or my wife cared too much about a clean house - yet, this is something that she is going to have to come to terms with too and when she is experienced enough, perhaps some of our perceived weaknesses will be seen as strengths in hindsight.
The experience of parent who works too much, is likely to be better than a parent who doesn't work enough. The experience of a house that is too clean, is likely better than one that is too dirty.
Define "too"
This is the problem with too, it is too subjective.
What is too much fun, what is too little fun? What is too much money, what is too little money? What is too much skill, what is too little skill?`
That last one is interesting - can a person be "too skilled"?
I guess it depends on which skills they are lacking.
For most of us, we are lacking a lot.
So we rely on what we have.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
"Jack of all Trades" keeps one inquiring into unknown, more inquisitive to being professional by trade in one dimension, I'll always enjoy learning new.
Over qualified I have had when approaching new positions in the past, how can one be over anything in any field, there is always something new to learn!
Small steps makes a great little foxy lady, hugs to the family, each parent does their best for the little ones.
@tipu curate
I kind of get it for some positions where they think that you might have too much experience and not be happy, moving on fast - but I also think that shouldn't be a disqualifying, as it can be that a person really wants to keep that level of job.
This is true too. Jacks tend to be very versatile in an organization and van play as pinch hitter when needed.
She was a great fox :)
Philosophy around people coming and going from positions is they are imparting knowledge as they gain and share, be it within a country or international.
Always been a 'Jack of all Trades', learn from the bottom and work your way up through the ranks, gleaning knowledge along the way. Many with degrees tend to disagree, expect to walk into the 'Top Job', often backfires not having on hand experience.
No-one can ever know too much!
This is very common now in younger generations. Degree, no experience.
Same is happening here, many have a degree, never offered opportunity into workforce.
Upvoted 👌 (Mana: 59/69) Liquid rewards.
Perhaps, she gives up when she couldn't do the best. I am not sure whether it is early to talk, but she should learn struggling to the end in the future :)
This is my fear - that she won't stick through the things that don't come easily enough.
Dear @tarazkp !
Smallsteps seem to start to resemble you as she grow!
I felt she was a diligent and strong person like you!
She is almost as annoying as me.
Dear friend @tarazkp, children at the age of six are a sponge that absorbs everything. Matthew, my son, also the same age as Smallsteps, is very active, his thing is painting, and he loves to know everything about dinosaurs; he already reads in English and Spanish.
He learns at his own pace, without pressure of any kind. I'm not worried about what the future holds for him because we work in the present to strengthen the foundations, just like you and Smallsteps' mum do.
Our mission as parents is precisely to give our children the tools they need, to prepare them for the global future they will face in the near future. To make them self-sufficient, productive and, of course, good men and women. And I can read in the eyes of little princess Smallsteps, that she is on the right track.
I extend a big virtual hug, full of blessings for the whole family, may the successes continue, and may we continue to live together with our children, taking advantage of those beautiful childhood years.
This is what I am hoping - the foundation for learning is independent of what is learned. Too many think that because their kids "know" stuff, they are smart - smart is being able to always learn more.
I wish more parents spent time with their kids creating stuff, rather than consuming stuff. Well done.
Hmm, it depends I suppose whether it is too skilled to the exclusion of other skills, like how to get with people.
I'm guessing that you know about Belbin and his ideas that it's helpful to have people with a range of skills between them to get things done. I've tended to work with people who are very social and others who are very systematic and organised. Not because I don't have those skills (some say 😜), but my strongest skills tend to be elsewhere.
I don't know about Belbin, but it is essentially what a production line does. It is efficient and effective, but also a little robotic at times.
I work with similar - I love having systematic people to work with, because I am a mess! :D
Expertise can be a relative term I think. There is something to be said for being a jack of all trades and while you may not feel you excel at any one thing, there are plenty of people who would disagree. There are many people who know more about computers than me, but to others I am like a tech god. The same is true with Blockchain. It all depends on your familiarity I think.
Experts tend to be a bit blind to what they don't know also - because they have skills in one area, it doesn't mean they translate. One of the things I have found in crypto for example, is that pure tech people don't get it, pure finance people don't get it and neither of them know how it interacts socially. Yet, they both "know" it isn't going to work.
Yeah, that is a good point. Just like so many gamers that are opposed to crypto for whatever reason.
The fact you are thinking about this means your are doing it as well as it can be done.
I think we are compelled to help our kids find something they will grow to love and develop a passion for. While that will happen, we will probably wonder if it is too late in the present. Now is always the best time.
What I have tried to do is simply enroll or involve them in different things in an effort to keep them busy but also trying new things. If I can somehow help them eliminate thresholds stopping them from wanting to try something new then they will ideally develop an adventurous spirit and be inspired to try new things.
One side lesson I have learned in this endeavour is that it is a gift to be able to enjoy something you are not very good at. We stove for achievement so much perhaps we can become frustrated with the mistakes and imperfect results that come with trying, failing and learning. When they find something the like so much and enjoy sucking at it, then they will have something they can develop a passion for and drive their own development with our help.
I hope that when I am done with this phase of parenting, I will have helped develop a generalist who has the basics already down and will have a head start on what will become a specialty.
If not, remember there is always grand kids where we can make up for the mistakes we made!
I read once about a family of geniuses, but neither parent was genius level at anything. What they did was help their kids find what they were good at and supported them to grow with it.
Wouldn't it be great to never lose the sese of adventure?
This is what holds me back from singing publicly - total embarrassment. It is strange, in some respects I don't mind looking the fool - in others it is very difficult. I should think on that more and work out why.
If they can learn anything, they get to pick and choose what and hopefully, pivot when needed in what I suspect is going to be a more volatile world.
I think our job at that point is to just feed them sugary foods and send them home to sleep. :D
I have sung on stage with a band in front of hundreds of people but wouldn't sing in front of anyone til I was probably 40? I remember the first song I worked myself up to singing karaoke and almost simultaneously having a heart attack and stroke as my name was called. My whole being was trying to run from the room but I walked right up and sang Jeremy by Pearl Jam. I think it went okay and I have never stopped fighting the flight impulse ever since.
I would say this is the best way. Everyone is drunk, most are awful singers, and quite a few are both. You are SUPPOSED TO SUCK at karaoke so just do it!
We can't have it all or know it all. We are humans and our level of inquisitiveness differs.
While some see themselves getting into this and that and many more in the case of Smallsteps, others just stick to two things.
I believe there is nothing like "too" much. And in the case of people who are flexible in going from one thing to another, they get to know different things which always comes in handy.
Let's just all do whatever makes us happy and any other things that come our way. We don't know where life will take us tomorrow.
It is funny you should say, as while I don't know much, I can have a discussion with people on pretty much any topic :D
That's because you know different things just like how your daughter does too.
I want to be a professional splinterlands player. But that is unlikely to ever happen...
There are people doing it already :)
She looks so cute in fox outfit 😍 I'm happy that she perform in the show, it'll increase her confidence level and she learn many things from it too just like cooperation 💫
Confidence is something I am hoping she will build in the future - not "too" confident though :)
Yes we hope for a good future for her 🥰
Well, I believe that it is never too late. Who knows if she's going to take it as a profession when she grows up?
Six is not late...
Love to read that she is learning piano. She is looking cutest Fox and she is awwwww innocent. May she always feel you proud. May God bless daughters of everyone.
She is adorable in that costume
By some standards, I was an awful parent. I didn't care about grades, only that they did what they could, but they all excelled in grades anyway. I didn't push sports (I hated being a sports mom), but they all enjoyed playing something. I didn't push music, and they all loved music despite. My house was hardly ever what anyone would call clean, and the two still living keep their houses much cleaner than I do. I didn't limit how much candy they could eat, and none of them developed a sugar tooth.
If you want your kids to be themselves, do not push yourself on them. Let them see you love what you do, and they will learn to love what they do.
Can a person be too skilled? Only if they hate doing what they do well.
Learn how to sing man. It feels really good, and is excellent exercise.
There's this delusion that the younger you start the better and quicker they'll get some things which is why 3yo kindies are a thing. This may even be true in some cases but in general I don't think it makes too much of a difference, sometimes you're just not going to get things til you're ready to get things no matter what (and in a low amount of cases that might be never). Like at our club we had kids who started in Tiny Tots (basically if they can at least crawl, but most of them were toddling) and one that started in high school (never done gym or dance or anything related before) that was almost as good or better.
Also dance is still technically a sport. I have had many, many arguments about male dancers and male gymnasts being stronger and fitter and better coordinated than footy players XD
She looks so freaking adorable in the fox gear XD
In fairness to you, there's only so much you want to narrow into. Like J is a software engineer, but he also gets bored very easily and needs new things to do and new problems to solve semi-regularly. His current role seems to have that as they moved him from contract to permanent to not lose him and he hasn't bounced yet (he has bounced a few other jobs after a few years as they stagnated), and at this stage in his career he's at a point where people are calling him as he has remained varied in what he can do, apparently in that field it's not uncommon for people to niche themselves so hard they become exceptional at their niche and can't/won't do much of anything outside of it, which he sees as limiting options a bit too much.
I think there is "too skilled" though it came with "too smart", I have met a couple of people like that and we all playfully thought that it was unfair that they had hoarded all the smarts and not shared it out with everyone else XD Only one of them was lazy and relied entirely on their smarts to get them through life though, no idea what happened to them, the rest were just very drivenm, motivated people who were very curious about everything and wanted to try everything. I guess if you want something badly enough you will find ways to be able to do it.
If smallsteps has the time to think (which a lot of schoolkids don't seem to have, or at least that's the conclusion I've drawn purely from observation) she might arrive at the same conclusion as 18yo drew when he decided he wanted to discuss his upbringing with me a few days after his 18th birthday, in being generally happy with her childhood and how you did things (there will always be at least one thing that she thinks you should have done differently, but as long as it was good in general). And I think when/if she talks to you about it in 12-13 years that will be the case.
This line very much reminded me of the movie: Everything, Everywhere, All At Once. There are so many alternate paths out there, it is no use worrying about the ones you did not take. Instead, make the most of the path you are currently on, and if it doesn't serve you -- find a new path!
Oh dear.
Nothing in your Hive wallet, though.
:D