Hello Folks!
As you all know, I have been doing a lot these days and, yes, I am tired and, I might even fall asleep typing on my laptop. But before doing so, I just want to share my experiences these past few days.
Dealing with stress and failure are not my two main strengths. Simply because there is a social stigma attached to these things. Yes. I might seem to be very accepting. I might even be projecting a certain amount of confidence while I was writing the post. The thing is, I cannot deal with failure twice in two consecutive times without that much "time gap."
copyright by pixabay
I would like to view myself like a machine that needed to be "cooled" in order for me to function well. And, dealing with all the drama last week, plus another added bonus today would have taken me over the edge. Its not easy being me and, I am not going to deny that there was a time in my life that I got to the point that I was really contemplating suicide.
Let me just run some basic statistics:
In Australia, 65000 people attempt suicide each year. Suicide is also the main cause of death for people ages 15- 44 years of age. (this is the link folks: https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/clinical-resources/suicide-self-harm/facts-about-suicide-in-australia)
Perhaps, one of my advantages was that I had been through a lot in my younger years and, the thought that I am a nurse by profession is also a plus because, I can recognize the early signs and symptoms and get the help I needed. It also helps that I am so interested on my self preservation aside from being innately talkative and curious person!
Because of the incident last week, I have decided to go and speak to a counselor because, I wanted to make sure that I am all right. Yes. its still part of my "self- preservation mode" but also, it is my duty to myself and to the people I love and who are around me to ensure that I am all right.
A wonderful lady I met on line said this to me: "most people do not want to commit suicide. They just want the pain to go away." That might be physical pain, psychological stress- whatever causes the pain (just a little side comment from the naughty side of me: if someone or something is causing you pain, wouldn't it be more logical or practical to eliminate the source and not you? Just saying...……. )
Ask for help
It does not really need to be a professional. It could be a friend, a colleague- someone who is willing to support and listen to you. in Australia, this is the suicide help hotline 131114. This is 24 hours/7 days a week thing. I haven't really tried calling them but, I do trust the person who gave me that number. And, this is the link to their website:
When I had those moments when I was contemplating dying, I was so petrified. I really did not expect that from me but when desperate times do come, I guess that it just happens. that is a risk that I do not really want to take so before it gets worst, I CALLED A FRIEND. It was a very expensive call because it was overseas but what that call did was reassure me that I am not alone. That I am normal. That I am undergoing so much stress and, yes. I do deserve a break.
Do something that makes you happy
Folks, I did not research this but, whenever I get upset, I do try to do something that makes me happy. That includes putting in something that looks like this:
(yeah, I do not really consider sheet masking as a special treat to myself- I mask every other day- but, its part of my self care and, it makes me feel confident flaunting my skin without any make ups!)
To crafting.
(not a surprising hobby for me folks but, I really do these things to
Spending time with friends.
To walking.
And, writing about it here. Well, I guess not everyone is comfortable doing this but I am.
Know when you needed help
Well, this is something that is difficult to recognize and depends from person to person. for me, anything that makes me uncomfortable, makes me obsess over it, upsets me, makes me go through ranges of emotions from hatred, anger to loneliness and anything in between and, I am not able to resolve it, I ask for help.
The key is knowing when to ask for help.
At the end of the day, I was able to cope up with life not necessarily because I have what it takes to do so. I believe that just like any other person out there, I do have those moments when I despair and feel that the world is closing in on me. I just want to add that exploring this part of my life here is difficult but, I guess the first thing I needed to do is to have that courage to raise my hand and say, me too- I had those moments!
What the heck? That is waaaaaaaay too much! I don't think that is a society in the right track. Something needs to change... and fast.
I hope you'll bounce back quickly, @nurseanne84! Don't let a failure in studying define you. In the long scheme of things, that hardly matters. As you'll see a few years from now!
I already did. i was just writing about my previous experience
Great advices, coming from a fellow nurse. Stay positive!
Hi
Bengy left a comment on something about you joining Team Aus. You are very welcome. I just need some things from you first.
You can get more information here:
https://steemit.com/teamaustralia/@choogirl/team-australia-new-recruits-13-03-19-things-are-still-ticking-along
Weird... It's like summoning the devil by speaking the name! I promise I will only summon you in the moment of my greatest need...
😂
@choogirl, I have voted for ausbitbank already... I just want to clarify a few things: the introductory post- should I make a new post then link it to you or, do I send it like a private message to discord?
It's totally up to you. If you want to make an intro post and send me the link go for it. If you just want to write a couple of sentences about yourself in discord that's totally fine too. It's your choice.
thank you @choogirl. I will definitely accomplish these things as soon as I can.
Take some away from the computer and focus your mind on the great things you enjoy really doing.
Indeed @chesatochi.
I know what you mean. I've tried suicide a few times in my life, but these days I'm a living death so no point in suicide as I'm already dead
that is indeed an interesting comment. do you mind elaborating on why you consider yourself dead already?
Don't know really, maybe it's because I'm so old and without anything to look forward to
I do not know about your situation in life but, I am just looking forward to do things. Perhaps shopping, speaking to your friends- doing something new.
Yes, this might be weird but, I find window shopping exciting!
Suicide is really popular in Korea. People don't tend to deal with failure well and mental health is sorely neglected.
I've heard the rates are only higher among native Americans and Australians, etc.
Yes indeed! In the Philippines, the mental health is not that much prioritized so people speaking up their minds and asking their helps were often subjected to social stigma. For me, the most important thing is to speak up. It won't kill you asking for help. What would kill you is not asking for help and pretending everything else is just fine.
Interesting to learn why you took up nursing, a field in which you are very comfortable in obviously. Keeping an eye on yourself knowing your triggers when something is going wrong.
Finding oneself down is one thing, being depressed to a point of considering taking your own life, maybe an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, doctors may have some medication to assist through bad patches.
Never suffering from deep depression, after a walk in nature I even keel again, so will not pass comment when one does not understand the full implications.
Joan, there are a lot of factors why a person tries to kill themselves and not just on the imbalance on the brain. For one thing, a person's experience, cultural background, religious convictions, even stress levels. Yes. Indeed, neurotransmitters - the chemicals in the brain may play a part in it. but not necessarily the only source.
I agree, that is why I said I do not fully understand, not being a sufferer, however I do know both young and old suffering with deep depression today.
Take one day at a time and listen to your body, you normally know what is best for yourself.
Don't you dare think about suicide, Ever! Go to Gaza Bank if you want to suicide, give helps to the children that being attacked by the israeli army before you decide to die.
You need a friend @nurseanne84, a real one.. try to make friend with a local student if you have to. But... you knew yourself very well. Deal with whatever that fears you.. thought and pray for you my dear.
Pet a cat or dog if you have to. Talk to your mom through skype or whatsapp video call.. don't think it will cost you much if you find a free wifi access.. though you have the rights to feel so down, but don't hsng around that feeling too long. Failures means you need to rise up and try it again. You are a lucky woman, you have a good way to speak out your mind.
I had those moments but, it passed @cicisaja. How can I come and visit you there in Indonesia if I'm already dead. hehehehe
Thanks God.. it'll passed.. so, grab yourself a full of spirit to complete your study and enjoy a week or 2 vacation before you go back to your routine.. soend your day with me... I'll feed you up
@nurseanne84 Thanks for sharing your insights and information on suicide.
Have you tried meditation? This sounds like a cliche question but holds merit. Google for some guided meditations for stress.
added: resteeming this is a topic that can help
An extremely importanst subject... people are under so much stress.
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Dear @nurseanne84
I hope you don't mind if I would remove my little delegation as I would like to use some of my STEEM POWER to support "project #hope" (I mentioned about it in my latest post).
If you think that you may still need that that delegation then please let me know. I checked your current SP and I think you should be fine.
Let me know:)
Yours, Piotr
Dear Piotr,
I do not mind at all. You are welcome to remove it anytime and, I hope that the person you would be delegating would also utilize it into good use.
Thank you very much.